After going an impressive 13-2 in Week 16 and not being bested by any of you primates, Football Cat has decided to spend this between-the-holidays weekend maxing and relaxing at the Fortress of Fortitude. Football Cat will return for the final week of the NFL season.
Football Cat wishes glad tidings to all of you.
As it turns out, Football Cat was making rather merry yesterday, and is in no condition to make picks this week. But fear not! Other the15net.com adjacent animals have graciously stepped up to fill the void. Football Cat will be back next week, tanned and rested, and ready to ring in the New Year.
Saturday Dinner Time
Texans at Chargers (-1.5)
After a thorough review of each team’s sleep scores and rain gauges, Frank says take the Texans
Saturday Prowl Time
Ravens at Packers (-3)
Jocko doesn’t like the Black Birds
Sunday Lunch Time
Seahawks (-7) at Panthers
Jocko doesn’t like the Black Cats
Cardinals at Bengals (-7.5)
Warren Dull’s second stepfather’s neighbor’s nephew’s grandmother once had a budgie that got eaten by her bridge partner’s cat. The stripey cats do the same to the pretty red birds.
Steelers (-3) at Browns
The Cleveland Pig will be drowning her sorrows at the feeding trough
Jaguars (-6.5) at Colts
Kenny the pet bee thinks the Jags swarm the Colts. Indy better have extra epee pens on hand.
Buccaneers (-5.5) at Dolphins
Jasper loves the Bucs inside and out.
Patriots (-13.5) at Jets
Loki is waiting to see a jet crash and burn
Saints (-2.5) at Titans
Millie says to lay it all on the Tits
Sunday Dinner Time
Giants (-1.5) at Raiders
The Teddy the doodle is a fan of Pete the poodle
Eagles at Bills (-1.5)
Packo loves Buffalo, especially their wings with a nice coating of Rub Smoke Love BEEF CAKE premium all-natural beef rub and seasoning.
Sunday Prowl Time
Bears at 49ers (-3)
Marv thinks that Bears will lay low and then suddenly snap and go for the 49ers jugular.
Monday Prowl Time
Rams (-7.5) at Falcons
Cocaine bear loves LA
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
Do you like football? Of course you do or you wouldn’t be here. Do you like the color and pageantry of college athletics? We can see you rockin’ and reelin’, and hanging from the ceiling, so that’s a “yes”. And most importantly, do you like showtunes? *Squeals with delight!* Well Mr./Mrs./Ms./Dr. First Nighter do we have a fabulous quiz for you!
Each of the four games in this weekend’s college football playoff involves at least one team associated with a Tony Award winning Broadway musical!
Can you name the show for each matchup? (click to reveal the answer)
“Oklahoma” (Duh!)
“The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas”
“Show Boat”
“Hamilton”
Saturday Dinner Time
Eagles (-6.5) at Commanders
American Birds crush the Commies
Saturday Prowl Time
Packers at Bears (-1.5)
Northwest Indiana Bears grind the Meatmen
Sunday Lunch Time
Buccaneers (-3) at Panthers
Someone has to win this game, may as well be the Black Cats
Bills (-10.5) at Browns
What can Brown do for you, Patriots fans? Nothing. Bills cruise
Chargers at Cowboys (-2.5)
Fun fact: In Weeks 12 and 13, the Cowboys defeated the Eagles and Chiefs. In Weeks 14 and 15, the Chargers defeated the Eagles and Chiefs. That was the first time that two different teams defeated the previous season’s Super Bowl teams in consecutive weeks. Bolts shock Boys
Jets at Saints (-5.5)
Saints cook Jets
Vikings (-3) at Giants
Vikings sink tanking G-Men
Chiefs (-3) at Titans
Tits motorboat Mahomes-less Chiefs
Bengals (-4.5) at Dolphins
Stripey cats win vs Quinn the Fin
Sunday Dinner Time
Falcons (-3) at Cardinals
Raptors raid pretty red birds nest
Jaguars at Broncos (-3)
Spotty cats can’t handle the (atmospheric) pressure
Steelers at Lions (-7)
Jungle Kings can’t be caged by Steel Men
Raiders at Texans (-14.5)
Texans toast Vegas
Sunday Prowl Time
Patriots at Ravens (-3)
Road warriors roll Ravens
Monday Prowl Time
49ers (-6) at Colts
Purrrrdy pops Ponies
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
Can YOU pick more winners than our own Football Cat? If so, you become eligible to win prizes!
Football Cat is all rested up and is ready to again take on all comers!
How to play? Seriously? It’s Week 14. Okay, maybe some of you are playing for the first time. Simply pick who you think will win this weekend’s games. (Sunday and Monday only, Football Cat negotiated no non-holiday Thursdays) Pick more winners than FC, and you can win either a The15 Inside Joke Prize Pack or a $25 Supermarket Gift Card! Your choice as to Market Basket, Big Y, Shaw’s, or Stop & Shop! (Or another, if you are outside the New England Area)
(One winner per week. In the event of a tie, a winner will be chosen at random. Winners remail eligible to also win in future weeks.)
Here are this weekend’s NFL matchups:
Titans at Browns
Seahawks at Falcons
Colts at Jaguars
Commanders at Vikings
Bengals at Bills
Saints at Buccaneers
Steelers at Ravens
Dolphins at Jets
Broncos at Raiders
Rams at Cardinals
Bears at Packers
Texans at Chiefs
Eagles at Chargers (Tiebreaker – total points scored)
Email your picks to bjbsjournalintern@gmail.com (prior to kickoff of the first listed game) or, if that isn’t your thing, post them on the Twitter and our jolly team of interns will make sure your entry is added to this week’s pool of contestants!
Good luck and glad tidings to all our contestants!
Football Cat’s Week 14 NFL Picks ’25
Time to check in with everyone’s favorite nonagenarian sportswriter, none other than legendary boxing and gridiron correspondent for the old Boston Evening Gazette, Buzz “Lefty” McBride. Mr. McBride would like to share his take on the controversial hit New England Patriots’ linebacker Christian Eliss placed on New York Giants’ quarterback Jaxson Dart during the first quarter of Monday night’s football game.
Buzz “Lefty” McBride: “Looks to me like Eliss knocked Jaxson Dart onto Queer Street”
Many thanks to “Lefty” for his thoughtful and enlightened commentary.
Sunday Lunch Time
Titans at Browns (-4.5)
Turds top Tits
Seahawks (-7) at Falcons
Fake sea birds rule the roost
Colts (-1.5) at Jaguars
Jags jettison Jones
Commanders at Vikings (-2.5)
Feds raid Minnesota
Bengals at Bills (-5.5)
Buffalo buries Burrow
Saints at Buccaneers (-8.5)
Bucs defrock the clergy
Steelers (-6) at Ravens
Scary black birds love a game played in a dark place
Dolphins (-2.5) at Jets
New Yorkers feast on frozen fish
Sunday Dinner Time
Broncos (-7.5) at Raiders
YOU want the Raiders to win, but you can’t always get what you want
Rams (-8.5) at Cardinals
Horney sheep trample pretty red birds
Bears at Packers (-6.5)
The pack is back!
Sunday Prowl Time
Texans at Chiefs (-3.5)
Indoor cats can’t handle the chill of the open plains
Monday Prowl Time
Eagles (-2.5) at Chargers
Patriotic birds zap Bolts
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
Welcome to Black Friday 2025!
Smart shoppers are avoiding the crowds by visiting the official the15net.com store to pick up their official the15net.com merchandise. It’s what all the cool people will be wearing to the office Christmas party. And who doesn’t want to be cool?
Sunday Lunch Time
Rams (-10) at Panthers
Horny sheep skin black cats
49ers (-4.5) at Browns
Prospectors fry Colonel Sanders
Texans at Colts (-4.5)
Indianapolis Jones whips Houston
Saints at Dolphins (-5.5)
Tua’s Dolphins dunk tanking Saints
Falcons (-2.5) at Jets
Birds of Prey soar over sputtering Jets
Cardinals at Buccaneers (-2.5)
Pretty Red Birds fly past Bucs
Jaguars (-6.5) at Titans
Spotted cats top Tits
Sunday Dinner Time
Vikings at Seahawks (-11.5)
Sam Darnold haunts Vikings
Raiders at Chargers (-10)
Bolts put out Vegas’ lights
Bills (-3.5) at Steelers
Buffalo wings Yinzers
Sunday Prowl Time
Broncos (-6) at Commanders
Rested Broncos bust Commies
Monday Prowl Time
Giants at Patriots (-7.5)
Pats head to the bye on a high
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
Turkey fans enjoy giving out gobbles this time of year, but what about America’s fastest, and fattest, growing dietary subgroup the Porksaterians? Well don’t worry Porky, we’re here to satisfy you with a serving of oinks.
Grant Huckvale (a.k.a. Hogdale):
Hogdale carved a niche for himself as an overly exuberant alternative broadcaster to the stoic and bland official Red Sox play-by-play teams on NESN and WEEI. Over the summer you’d see Hogdale clips occasionally retweeted into your timeline, usually after Red Sox wins, and you’d think to yourself “I think that’s the tops“. We probably all agree that Hogdale is special. Smash cut to present day, and we are confronted with a hog of a different color. Barstool, in an effort to fill an obese chromosomically challenged void in their lineup, swooped in and waved a lucrative (by part-time minimum waged Iowan standards) five figure contract in front of Hogdale’s snout and lured him into their slaughter house. Now Hogdale’s giant screaming maw is ever present, ever hot takey and ever annoying. To quote Rocky IV: “What started out as a joke has turned into a disaster”.
4 oinks 🐷🐷🐷🐷
Thanksgiving early eaters time
Packers at Lions (-2.5)
Jungle Kings slice and dice Cheese Heads
Thanksgiving late eaters time
Chiefs (-3.5) at Cowboys
Squantos feast on the Pilgrims
Thanksgiving overeaters time
Bengals at Ravens (-7)
Scary Black Birds bury Burrow’s boys
Black Friday Afternoon Nap time
Bears at Eagles (-7)
Birds bully Bears
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
Please enjoy some pre-Thanksgiving haikus…
A Cat:
Humans are so strange.
Mine lies still in bed, then screams!
My claws aren’t that sharp.
Football:
Pigskin, gridiron
These equal true happiness
All thanks to Bert Bell
Robert Kraft:
Desperate for praise
Time for my prepaid close up
Get my booster seat
Kendra Middleton:
I crave attention
Look at me I am zany
Stop bothering me
Bob Socci:
This is not tv
Please give me down and distance
This is radio
Scott Zolak:
Must you grunt and groan
You are ruining the game
Try doing less coke
Sunday Lunch Time
Jets at Ravens (-13.5)
The Poes crawl out from under the floor boards
Steelers at Bears (-2.5)
Bears won’t be caged
Patriots (-8.5) at Bengals
Stripey cats can’t trap Pats
Giants at Lions (-10.5)
Jungle kings cut down Giants
Vikings at Packers (-6.5)
Packmen gobble up JJ
Colts at Chiefs (-3.5)
Native peoples corral Colts
Seahawks (-13.5) at Titans
Fake seabirds best the breasts
Sunday Dinner Time
Jaguars (-2.5) at Cardinals
Spotted cats swallow pretty red birds
Browns at Raiders (-3.5)
Black hole excretes the Browns
Eagles (-3.5) at Cowboys
Birds beat Boys
Falcons (1.5) at Saints
Saints flush Falcons in the Toilet Bowl
Sunday Prowl Time
Buccaneers at Rams (-6.5)
It’s no longer Baker Mayefield, it’s Baker Won’t-field
Monday Prowl Time
Panthers at 49ers (-7)
Purrrrdy boxes black cats
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
Can YOU pick more winners than our own Football Cat? If so, you become eligible to win prizes!
Congratulations to Warren Dull’s aunt for beating Football Cat once again in Week 10!
How to play? Simply pick who you think will win this weekend’s games. (Sunday and Monday only, Football Cat negotiated no non-holiday Thursdays) Pick more winners than FC, and you can win either a The15 Inside Joke Prize Pack or a $25 Supermarket Gift Card! Your choice as to Market Basket, Big Y, Shaw’s, or Stop & Shop! (Or another, if you are outside the New England Area)
(One winner per week. In the event of a tie, a winner will be chosen at random. Winners remail eligible to also win in future weeks.)
Here are this weekend’s NFL matchups:
Commanders at Dolphins
Panthers at Falcons
Buccaneers at Bills
Chargers at Jaguars
Bears at Vikings
Packers at Giants
Bengals at Steelers
Texans at Titans
49ers at Cardinals
Seahawks at Rams
Ravens at Browns
Chiefs at Broncos
Lions at Eagles
Cowboys at Raiders (Tiebreaker – total points scored)
Email your picks to bjbsjournalintern@gmail.com (prior to kickoff of the first listed game) or, if that isn’t your bag, post them on the Twitter and our hardy heam of interns will make sure your entry is added to this week’s pool of contestants!
Good luck to all our contestants!
As DRAKE-A-MAYENIA sweeps the six state region, we’d just like to remind you where you first were introduced to that fantastic (and potentially lucrative) phrase… it was HERE, in Football Cat’s Week 13 NFL Picks ’24!
and also here, in Football Cat’s Week 15 NFL Picks ’24!
As part of our pending intellectual property infringement lawsuit(s), our special council has advised us to put all of our ideas out there (that’s legal jargon). So without further ado we bring you our latest potential merchandise ideas (TRADEMARK!):
Remember, never settle for cheap imitations when you can choose the high quality original! Only available (potentially) at the15net.com official store!
Sunday Desayuno Time
Commanders at Dolphins (-2.5)
¡Los delfines ganan!
Sunday Lunch Time
Panthers at Falcons (-3.5)
Black cats can’t catch a break, or find a win
Buccaneers at Bills (-6)
Bills bully Baker
Chargers (-3) at Jaguars
Spotted cats get zapped by Plugs
Bears at Vikings (-2.5)
Norsemen sneak by sleepy Bears
Packers (-7) at Giants
There will be no metamorphosis under Kafka’s leadership.
Bengals at Steelers (-5.5)
Yinzers flatten Flacco
Texans (-6) at Titans
Tex squeezes Tits
Sunday Dinner Time
49ers (-3) at Cardinals
Purrrrdy swallows pretty red birds
Seahawks at Rams (-3)
Horny sheep trample fake sea birds
Ravens (-7.5) at Browns
Scary black birds flush the Browns
Chiefs (-3.5) at Broncos
Chiefs bust Broncos
Sunday Prowl Time
Lions at Eagles (-2.5)
Jungle kings claw out a win in Philly
Monday Prowl Time
Cowboys (-3.5) at Raiders
Ranch hands rustle Raiders
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
The 15 