Can YOU pick more winners than our own Football Cat? If so, you become eligible to win prizes!
Back to the salt mines.
How to play? Simply pick who you think will win this weekend’s games. (Sunday and Monday only, Football Cat negotiated no non-holiday Thursdays) Pick more winners than FC, and you can win your choice of either a The15 Inside Joke Prize Pack, a $25 Ninety Nine Restaurant Gift Card, or a $25 Supermarket Gift Card! Your choice as to Market Basket, Big Y, Shaw’s, or Stop & Shop! (Or another, if you are outside the New England Area)
Fun! Prizes!
(One winner per week. In the event of a tie, a winner will be chosen at random. Winners remail eligible to also win in future weeks.)
Here are this weekend’s NFL matchups:
Bears at Panthers
Buccaneers at Bengals
Ravens at Colts
Saints at Lions
Bills at Texans
Browns at Jaguars
Jets at Titans
Falcons at Steelers
Packers at Vikings
Commanders at Eagles
Dolphins at Raiders
Cardinals at Chargers
Cowboys at Giants
Broncos at Chiefs (Tiebreaker – total points scored)
Email your picks to bjbsjournalintern@gmail.com (prior to kickoff of the first listed game) or, if that isn’t your bag, post them on the Twitter and our shiny new batch of interns will make sure your entry is added to this week’s pool of contestants!
And good luck to all our contestants!
Time to gnaw the tape. What’s that? Grind tape? Agree to disagree.
Well, at least Revolution salvaged a win for the region tonight!
Is Ed Hand Hogdale’s conservator?
Imagine the first thing you think of after the Gonzalez signing is Dave Brown?
Doug Eddings didn’t like the tilt of Western Michigan’s helmets and gave Michigan another play.
We’re all poorer for not hearing Jerry Remy say “Mickey Gaspah.”
I guess Pablo found out…
It’s nice that they have a football game to support this Microsoft Tablet promotion.
Who could have forseen the Michael Lombardi implosion coming?
Cakes are coking for Artie Tripp, Danny Hutton, José Feliciano, Larry Nelson, Barriemore Barlow, Bill O’Reilly, Don Muraco, Don Powell, Joe Perry, Gary Danielson, Amy Irving, Pat Mastelotto, Johnny Hickman, Carol Decker, Chris Coloumbus, Colin Firth, Randy Johnson, Joe Nieuwendyk, Robin Goodridge, Big Daddy Kane, Guy Ritchie, Ben Wallace, Ryan Phillippe, Timothy Goebel, Misty Copeland, Joey Votto, Matthew Followill, Ashley Monroe, Coco Rocha, Jordan Staal, and Brooke Henderson.
Nancy Grace is a great American.
If it’s not a Super Bowl, it’s not a Super Bowl rematch.
Nick Wright is what Gorilla Monsoon once famously said..the fountain of misinformation.
Ms. Rachel can hoop, Oh HELL YEAH!
Hey gang that’s got spirit, this week’s Phrase that Pays is, “They all have great jobs they just sling cvnt for the love of the game.”
I hope El Prez doesn’t have to shutter the Chicago Office as a cost cutting measure after the Rutgers bet debacle.
Fun Australia Fact: All the koalas have chlamydia.
Sorry, but I ain’t getting in a driverless automobile of any kind. I don’t trust it.
Jason Kelce’s TV is mounted too high.
Maybe they should call her ‘Ben Shelton’s girlfriend’ instead of ‘Dennis Rodman’s daughter.’ Would that be better, ladies?
Map out your route during the Orange Line diversion between Forest Hills and Back Bay. On September 10-14, use alternate transit: Free shuttle buses, free Commuter Rail trains between Forest Hills, Ruggles, Back Bay, and South Station.
That Van Natta article about no wrongdoing being found seems to have been really accurate.
Patriots will rebound when they’re back home, with the welcoming lighthouse and the blank wall where the Jerod Mayo mural used to be.
A 20 piece McNugget is $7 right now.
If baseball wasn’t at minimum, occasionally boring the Savannah Bananas wouldn’t be a thing.
The puffy helmet looks extra gay when you suck.
Buddy, what’s up with those bobo batteries? No wonder why they’re all dead as Dillinger. When it comes to batteries, you gotta go Duracell, or Energizer. Only two options.
Just a reminder that UNC plays East Tennessee State on Saturday afternoon, in case you’re looking for some REAL football.
Imagine watching Nancy Grace on TV in 2026?
Clips could have gotten away with the whole thing if Kawhi just took a picture next to a tree.
The Farmer’s Dog has been named the NFL’s first official Pet Food Partner. The multi-year partnership kicks off with a campaign starring Giants RB Cam Skattebo and his senior rescue dog, Duke.
That wasn’t very abercrombie of Drake Maye.
Eddie Andelman would have loved this 7’3” Chinese chick. She’s the basketball equivalent of a sumo hockey goalie.
Flailing Flemming finally forces Finn fingerwag.
As a running back would you rather be a bell cow or a work horse?
Go. Go U. Go UMass. Go UMass!
Excited to watch Frusen Glädjé prove he deserves the 50-million-dollar contract extension.
My day literally consists of editing my Patriots hype video, continuing my “Patriots as Comic Book Characters” blog, pretending to check my work email, repeat.
They send you to rehab to get cured off of the edibles?
I don’t think I’ve ever seen fog like this before…
Want some whiskey in your water? Sugar in your tea? What’s all these crazy questions You’re askin’ me? This is the craziest party That could ever be Don’t turn on the lights ‘Cause I don’t wanna see
Mama told me not to come, oh Lord Mama told me not to come She said, “That ain’t the way to have fun, No.”
A plastic container of spices loses 17% of its flavor when it crosses state lines.
‘Pallet fort’ in French is ‘fort de palette.’
Fantastic. Wish you the best. You will have a suit on your door when AI opens up your info. We will have fun then!
Cover screws have torque specs?
We lost Danny Gans way too soon. Incredible talent.
Mut put out a video that he thought a horse Portnoy owns had a great shot of winning its race at Saratoga and the nag came in eighth place. Incredible.
Another big goal for Capi!
I thought the whole point of having chicks on the college recruiting staff was so they’d have sex with the recruits?
Honk if you remember Carling Black Label.
Luckily Brown’s not injury prone and hasn’t had high ankle sprains last all season long before in Tennessee or anything.
Dawn Light makes the all-Synonym Team.
The NBA Cup winner should get the forfeited Clippers picks.
What does Jerry Thornton do for Barstool now anyways? Is he their correspondent to the Vatican?
You go out there and show that hyboid cancer who’s boss Marc Bertrand!
Walpole Joe Morgan. Lunchpail guy and manager of these nine. Magic. He will be dearly missed.
Best bet for the weekend: Eagles over Scarlet Knights out to Chestnut Hill.
Probably not available on Blu-ray.
Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Joe Giza, Matt Vautour, Marlee Wierda, and the members of #the15 were used in this column.Shalise Manza Young. Shalise Manza Young. Shalise Manza Young, went to the baño; what have they done?
(Dear The15net dot com Wicked Pissah Beantown Chowderheads Platinum Elite Members; Here is the musical playlist for your Labor Day weekend enjoyment. In the car, at the beach, by the lake, or just at home. Assorted Songs of Work and Toil, Songs of Celebration & Songs of Summer’s Departing. Click HERE to download.)
You Can’t Sideload Happiness – 4 Tabs Tiled
Pineapple Upside Down Cake – Muddle of Pudd
Catfishing Toes – MegO Rapscallian
Seersucker Sal (Done Got Killed by His Gal) – Turkeypie Jefferson
Feels – Fat Human Coinstar
It’s Raining Lies – The Drought Doubters
A Shitbird’s Lament – Pat McAfee
You Can Leave Your Tarp On – Joe Cocker
Love – Jaren Dolers
Who Won? We WON – Clamcastic Fantastic
Fictitious Fish – Jethro Trull (with Fictional Friction)
Crazy Baker Lady (gluten free mix)- Deadmau5
Someone’s in Sedona with Dianna – Mick Gindaloon & His Dumb Polacks
My Ever Changing Moods – Marion Council
Strange Fruit – Upton Bellie Holiday
Blitz, JC, The Barber, & Johnny V – They Might Be Giants
Unfunny Man – Emerson Lotzia & Palmer
Where Have All the Traffic Cones Gone? – MassDOT Highway Division Special Projects Chorus
My Best Friend Dan Lifshatz – Known Cunt
3 to 5 – Joshy Parton
Heading for a Fall – The Michael Hollies
Take Em Out (Miss Porter’s Mix) – Franz Onlyfans
Slur – Tears for Rears
Makin’ Mercury Grand Marquises – Ron Catamount Muskmelon
(Don’t Go Back to) Nashua – J.R.M.
Where Did I Say I Was A Fortunate Son? – Steve Steve R
Pictures Of Butchie – The Murphs
Data Center Outage Blues – Norton Adams & The State Collegians (Live)
Paprika Caravan – Martin Denny
Big Jeff From Work – Wamesit Lanes Men’s Glee Club
Union Sundowning – Bob Ryan
Birth, School, ???, Death – Gillfathers
Something’s Fishy – The Aggrieved White Clam Exercise Band
Drivelinin’ – Robert Parker
Have a Job Do a Job Work a Job Give a Job – The Middsy 5
Uncrustable in Paradise – Marvelous Mike
Take This Job and Rat Shovel It – Brawny Paycheck
That’s What I Want – Lil Nas BHL
Amor y Control – Ruben Blades
No Work and All Play – Living in a Van Marion
Don’t Talk to Me About Work (Unless it’s During a Strike) – Lou Merloni
You’re Next – Happy Warriors Cancellation Brigade
Vacation – We All Wish Kendra Would Go-Go
We’re Going to Be Friends – Marvelous Mike and the Fudge Stripes
Free Fallin’ – Michael Holley, Michael Holley!
Love Photo No. 9 (in the grid) – Dan Kelley Sports
The Hot Dog Rollers Won’t Fix Themselves – First Aid Kit (feat. Yngwie Malmsteen)
Pictures of Sal – The Milk Carton Kids
Main Theme to ‘The Fat Guy & The AI P.I.’ -The CBS Procedural Orchestra
Unsafety Dance – Men Without Shame
(Have a song suggestion? Or a compliment? Leave it in the comments! Or just reply on Twitter, I guess.)
Mainstream CFB writers being introduced to a BB team winning a rock fight is delightful. And 15-10 is like a perfect Belichick win. Pisses off exactly all the right people.
All these trust fund kids circle jerking over how little they made in their useless media jobs isn’t at all triggering.
They weren’t booing Páez, they were still cheering on Woo!
In the back of my mind I thought the Pro Bowl had been eliminated years ago.
Dolly held the exact same social and political views as me!
I’m not going to be used as a pawn as the two sides piss at each other. If a deal isn’t done by September 9th, then I’ll be livid.
Derek Jeter did not “dive into the stands” to catch a ball. He made a nice running catch in the playing field, and his momentum carried him into the stands. Nice play, but not heroic.
I don’t even know what Good Good is other than redundant.
Note to broadcasters especially in MLB. Please call players by their last names and not their first. Its Rafaela not Cedanne. The trend started years ago and it isn’t a good one.
Since Boston doesn’t have a WNBA team yet, I’ve adopted Golden State as my team strictly because of Veronica Burton. The Valkyries won their third straight last night, and @Veronicaab22 had 13 assists and 0 turnovers. She has 29 assists and 1 turnover during the win streak.
Apropos of nothing, I hope Corey Kiner gets a locker in the corner of the locker room, so we can all call it Kiner’s Korner. #iykyk
Cakes are cooking for Peter Ueberroth, Mary Jo Catlett, Harry Northup, Rosalind Ashford, Nate Archibald, Terry Bradshaw, Rosanna DeSoto, Mark Harmon, Jimmy Connors, Linda Purl, Mario Tremblay, Steve Porcaro, Eric Dickerson, John S. Hall, Jeff Russell, Keanu Reeves, Lenox Lewis, Cynthia Watros, Rich Aurilia, Jason Hammel, Rachael Gunn, and Brandon Ingram.
No one ever talks about how heavily accordion is featured in Mexican music.
The people who hate seeing Kirk Herbstreit’s dog on TV are the same people who drive 5 mph under the speed limit in the left lane. You can’t convince me otherwise.
Hey, didja all hear about this guy who pretended to be a 49ers player? Haven’t seen many people talking about it. Crazy stuff, huh?
Red Line: Delays of about 10 minutes due to an earlier signal problem at Harvard.
I’m sorry but being a WAG is not being a woman in sports.
Omg seriously what is in Mickey’s crotch?
If I wanted to watch sweaty men dance in tight attire, I’d attend a Chippendales show rather than a Savannah Bananas game.
Dad is never using Venmo. You cannot make him.
Yesterday was “rentree” in France, a massive day. ALL of the schools are back in session Mayors and principals were interviewed on television.
Team Gaga btw. Madonna can kick rocks.
The Red Sox fill-in play-by-play guy on radio tonight sounds like Pablo Torre after 1.5 martinis, and I can’t shake it. But excited for the Clippers dirt he’ll have for the 7th inning stretch.
Where does one even acquire an Anduril hat?
The play made by Monasterio is ruled a catch against any other team. fact, not opinion.
Lucy go for a walk or something in Boston we boo if you stink up the joint you don’t like it move to Mars.
Can Elon ban all Barstool-related content? Every video I see is like “Oh man, Scuzzy and Grunch were going at it in the Chicago office today. Apparently one of them hooked up with Kacey Jugzzz at Dave & Buster’s last night? Super crazy. I’m glad Fat Tits Snapback Guy was recording.”
Hey gang of finger lickers, this week’s Phrase that Pays is, “Black buns and mashed potatoes sounds like something I’m not going to image search.”
I hope Jedixson Páez pitches on Section 10 Night.
Feels like I can’t make fun of the Clancy women anymore when there’s a large chunk of dudes convinced Sandusky is innocent.
Well, I hope MLB brings back protesting a game after the lockout season!
Thinking of that fat fucking cvnt Lifshatz calling people retards as his neck fat jiggles from typing is hilarious.
GTA 6 players will need to learn how to maintain a relationship, according to IGN. Don’t you play video games so you don’t have to go shopping with your wife?
I love the Mickey Gasper story as much as the next guy, but I draw the line at “Hey Mickey you’re so fine”
Greg you couldn’t be more wrong about this sub shop take you have in the oven and the Italian subs and all that nonsense.
I’ve found a home with writing haikus. The requirements are oddly helpful.
Bright eyes full of dreams, Laughter ringing through the air, Shining proud and free.
Lol you ever looked into toilet paper? If you aren’t using bamboo by now….yikes.
I bet Mike Mussina knows what day this is. I sure do.
Love her, but Heidi Watney should uncinch the screws holding her face back a couple of turns.
A Bill hasn’t defeated Dykes like that since DOMA back in ‘96.
You can tell someone is a football expert when they list a team’s schedule by the quarterbacks they’re going to play.
What time do they lock the Coliseum they got there in Rome for the night?
After a few hours of searching the house (detachable penis) And calling everyone I could think of I was starting to get very depressed (detachable penis) So I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast
Then as I walked down Second Avenue Towards St. Mark’s place where (detachable penis) All those people sell used books and other junk on the street I saw my penis lying on a blanket (detachable penis) Next to a broken toaster oven Some guy was selling it (detachable penis) I had to buy it off him, he wanted 22 bucks (detachable penis) But I talked him down to $17.
People sure do demand a lot of decorum from a sport where it’s commonplace to gnaw on a wad of tobacco.
What a needy prick Giardi is. Really.
What if Good Good Golf re-shoots the ad but it’s RA getting shoved to the ground?
Rule 5 is usually a synonym for a bum.
Pro Tip: Ham sandwiches get indicted, not North Shore three-way beefs.
Honk if you remember The Jerry Lewis MDA Labor Day Telethon.
I know more about cards than 99.9% of people who own cards. I’ve covered cards for 26 years.
Lomu…..Latu…..Latu….Lomu.
Doesn’t every single gambling ad read on The Ringer end with “must be 21 and present”?
Turn off your radios numrods.
Jamai Webster still occasionally starts a question that he has no idea how to finish.
It’s my favorite time of year. BC could go undefeated!
Best bet for the weekend: buying 7 dozen eggs and 4 gallons of milk.
Take their picks! All of them!! (N.B. Kansas City won this Week 14, 2019 game 23-16, with Butker 3-3 on field goals, 2-2 on extra points.)
Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Joe Giza, Matt Vautour, BSMW Old Friend Humphrey, and the members of #the15 were used in this column.We’re dancing in the streets.
And Happy Birthday to Mexican actress Salma Hayek.
Welcome back to all the college and university students! And a particular welcome to our new squad of student interns here at The15, both in the Greater Boston area and elsewhere:
Emily Barncoat – ’29 Northeastern University
Fern Beckfick – ’29 Emmanuel College
Treydon Bouchet – ’29 University of Massachusetts – Lowell
Waylen Champlain – ’29 College of the Holy Cross
Zorba Fitzmurphy -’28 Boston University
Armando Glurge – ’29 Suffolk University
Willard Kelley – ’28 Bunker Hill Community College
Anastasia Krill – ’29 Boston College
Donnie Lonergan – ’28 Assumption University
Stefon Machafo – ’29 Emerson College
George Rao – ’29 Boston College
Ryan Sorghum – ’29 University of Massachusetts – Boston
Saoirse Vespa – ’29 Merrimack College
Turcotinga Willoughby – ’29 Boston University
Hannah Zuik – ’28 Framingham State University
We hope to learn as much from you, as you do from us. Remember: Knowledge Is Good.
Little was expected from North Carolina as they entered Ireland to play the TCU Horned Frogs in the season opener—the same team that thrashed them 48-14 and set the Tar Heels on a path of endless ridicule. Revenge never tasted so sweet, as Bill Belichick and his boys white-knuckled a 15-10 win. What makes this moment sweeter for a Belichick fan such as myself is the sense of how hard the team worked the entire offseason just to put their best foot forward. The roster turnover was jaw-dropping in its magnitude, akin to selectively thinning a forest to burn away the smaller, weaker underbrush and dead wood.
UNC introduced 59 new players to the squad this offseason, including 19 transfers and 40 first-year players. Meanwhile, 31 players departed through the transfer portal alongside standard graduations. Most of the team is made up of underclassmen, which hopefully signals the job security Belichick has for this season and the next as he develops them into effective juniors and seniors.
If you can’t stand the heat, get rid of the Kitchens.
On top of that, Belichick brought in Bobby Petrino to replace Freddie Kitchens. It’s too early to say whether UNC will improve from their dastardly, last-place mark in the ACC offensively from the year before. But his coaching, fused with the new crop of players led by 23-year-old journeyman Billy Edwards Jr., breathed fresh air into the system. The stat sheet was not lit up with gaudy numbers. But playing nearly error-free football on a sloppy field, combined with a modest 16-of-28 passing performance and 232 yards, is a hell of an improvement. Petrino was brought in to implement a balanced, pro-style offense mirroring the system Belichick ran in New England. So far the marriage has worked out well—and dare I say, it breeds confidence going forward.
But as Belichick says, coaches lose games; players win them. You’d be hard-pressed to find positive performances from UNC last season, especially on offense. The defensive side yielded hard-nosed, gritty efforts that typically went unnoticed. The only player on offense I can think of who left a mark on me from last year was running back Demon June (today he ran for 25 yards on 6 rushes), who now shares backfield duties with Benjamin Hall (11 carries, 36 yards) and Jaylen McGill (5 rushes for 33 yards and UNC’s lone touchdown).
But let us start by exalting the defense. Xavier Lewis served as UNC’s wrecking ball on the interior, dismantling TCU’s blocking and racking up 2 sacks and 4.5 tackles for loss on his own. Coincidentally, Lewis was one of Bill’s first recruits. Linebacker Derek McDonald led the entire team in total production. He clogged the running lanes all afternoon, securing a team-high 9 tackles. Defensive lineman Jaylen Harvey provided excellent edge containment and registered 5 combined tackles.
TCU did not score a single point in the second half. While everyone rushes to blame Sonny Dykes and try to place him on the hot seat, we should keep in mind this is a TCU team that won 9 games the last two seasons. They are a good program, and beating them is no small feat. Offensively, just by staring at the team stats you get a sense of how quietly UNC dominated TCU: 322 total yards to their opponents’ 281; 5.6 yards per play to their even 4. UNC committed just 3 penalties to TCU’s 11.
The team might have a legitimate weapon at tight end in Jelani Thurmond, who caught 4 passes for 94 yards, including an explosive 35-yard catch to ignite the Tar Heels’ opening scoring drive. Jordan Shipp went into the game expected to be Edwards’ most sure-handed receiver and lived up to the expectations, snagging 5 catches for 71 yards.
Overall, a solid opening for UNC hoping to wash away the bitter taste of last season 4-8 record. There’s a lot of work to be done; bumps in the road are surely to be expected. Progress is typically nonlinear. But as of now, the sky appears less filled with doom and gloom.
Vinny Jace is a special contributor to The15net.com.
Being really into baseball feels closer to being into trains or military history than it does following other sports. That’s not a judgement but an observation.
I think I’d rather be found in the actual ‘Palestine’ instead of a trailer park in East Palestine, Ohio.
Rear Admiral is like an alien from Men in Black trying to blend into society as a real person.
The Saugus Rocket with a worse takeoff than the Space Shuttle Challenger.
You would assume an MLB team owner would be more Hanukkah Steinberg than Kwanza Jones.
I’m sorry to say this because she seems like a lovely person but Mary Steenburgen’s voice goes right through me.
Roman is almost Nomar spelled backwards.
The local media was visibly disappointed there were no fights during the Pats/Eagles joint practice.
Sam Malone’s character was inspired by B’s Derek Sanderson – a charismatic athlete who hung around Boston bars in the ’70s and developed a drinking problem which derailed his career.
The only way Jerry Thornton could love Sophie Cunningham more is if she seduced a 14-year old boy.
Barn coat sales must spike every two years right before they start filming political ads.
Boutte had a lot of big catches. Big Boutte.
Cakes are cooking for Moe Tucker, Valerie Simpson, Bob Cowsill, Billy Rush, John Kinsella, Branford Marsalis, Ola Ray, Chris Burke, Dan Vickrey, Shirley Manson, Myron Guyton, Adrian Young, Drew Hester, Elaine Irwin, Melissa Mccarthy, Tyler Connolly, Carey Tally, Patrick Kennedy, Jamal Lewis, Chris Pine, Macaulay Culkin, Birdie Kim, John Mulaney, David Price, Wayne Simmonds, James Harden, and Keke Palmer.
If I was a billionaire NFL Owner, you’d never have to worry about me being in the news for soliciting prostitutes or going to a rub and tug. I’d be too busy just loving life owning an NFL team and wanting to win Super Bowls. Just saying lol
Lay off the naturals lady.
Have you seen any crazy hummus dip patterns lately?
Random but I love that theres just been a group of birds hanging out in left field all day. Eli White might be a Disney Princess in disguise.
Blue Line: Delays of about 15 minutes due to a maintenance train inspecting the overhead wires between Airport and Wonderland. Trains may stand by at stations.
Not to be misogynistic but women are idiots.
We live in a world where I have to see Tyler Milliken half naked. I’ve see that fat bitches tits more times in 6 months than Ive seen my wifes.. in fairness to Tyler, he looks like he’d understand what a love tap to the eye means after dinner.
Little League World Series dads in the stands wearing arm sleeves is why they hate us.
Eli White is Jewish Dave Roberts.
If Klay Thompson in 2000 2627 is part of your big 3, then your 3 is not big at all.
The Red Sox have gone from 14 games under .500 to 14 games over .500 in 62 days, the second-shortest such turnaround in MLB history (Elias Sports Bureau). The Red Sox are also the first team in MLB history to get to extra innings by way of two Mickey Gasper solo homers and a fastball hitting an umpire squarely in the face (Hurley Sports Bureau).
Just wait until someone reads the news to Ted Johnson.
Hey gang, this Week’s Phrase that Pays is, “What a strange reply. But yeah, you do you too.”
Cedanne cannot be trusted to challenge pitches.
Why didn’t Michael Holley think of that move when he was stuck co-hosting with Mike Salk?
It would really stick it to the patriarchy if Sara Civ were to dump them out.
An MBTA Orange Line shuttle bus that was supposed to take passengers to North Station accidentally drove them to Stoneham instead Thursday morning. The driver is no longer working the shuttle service. It happened on Day 1 of the 11-day Orange Line shutdown.
News Item: WNBA team reveals new queer turtle mascot to taunt Indiana Fever star Sophie Cunningham. Okay.
Paul Perillo is actually starting to look like the animated Bob’s Discount Furniture guy.
I got a ton of respect for Marcus Freeman. A Jim Tressel Buckeye if there ever was one.
Mario Hilario blowing Liberace isn’t as gay as the Sox outfield gayball celebration dance. Which is gay.
They left poor Lucy alone with Matt McCarthy on Boston Has Entered the Chat.
Want to hear something funny? I just dreamed I saw Mickey Gasper it a 414-foot homer to dead center!
A fan in a Luka Dončić jersey threw a green object on the court while the Sparks and Dream were lined up at the free-throw line. The object was covered up with a towel and the fan was chased onto the concourse by security.
Islands in the stream That is what we are No one in-between How can we be wrong? Sail away with me To another world And we rely on each other, ah-ha From one lover to another, ah-ha
Gresh keeps hot sauce in his purse? Who does he think he is, Hillary Clinton?
Honk if you remember living in a world where Mr. Don LaFontaine did the movie trailer voiceovers.
Fun fact: Dolly Parton wrote the songs ‘Jolene’ and ‘I Will Always Love You’ on the same day. But do you know who she wrote that second song about? You guessed it: Frank Stallone.
Middlebrooks having to gently contradict Flemming about 500 times a night is great radio.
Steve Buckley spends the year between the Oldtime Baseball Games sniffing the game-worn flannel uniforms.
A Cameo pep talk from someone who randomly cries over nothing? Where do I send my money?
Patriots did Celtics fans a solid by bringing a new Jaylen to town.
“Cash Considerations” would kinda be a perfect name for a Brian Cashman podcast.
Looking forward to the Celtics-76ers joint practices.
Kenni dresses like Sally O’Malley.
I am ready to go full Mensa Matt when they just hand Story his job back..pal.
The one damn time all the 350+ lb guys at Barstool HQ could be put to good use and not one of them to be found.
Best bet for the weekend: The Storrowings before ‘Allston Christmas.’
(In reality, the Oldtime Game uniforms are returned to storage by Royal White Laundry of Somerville.)
Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Joe Giza, Michael NMI Hurley, and the members of #the15 were used in this column.I hope life treats you kind.
Dolly Parton was a national treasure. She will be missed. RIP, nice lady.
Everyone will want to be in the Pat McAfee business.
You’d think after the Patriots played their first preseason game of the season WEEI would have their resident football expert, Ted Johnson, on to break down the game, but he must be overtired from late night tweeting and that’s why he isn’t on?
Holley passing out looks like when Urkel finally sees Laura Winslow in a bathing suit.
Can’t load the dishwasher? Murdered a cop OR your children? Well, don’t worry, ladies, we’re not allowed to hold you accountable for anything!
The Kraft Productions logo still has a pink tie, but hipster RKK now goes with an open collar!
Boy Tom Verducci has the IQ of a doorknob.
Is it a rule that everybody on the Toucher & Hardy show has to wear a hat?
Lou damn Merloni just said that soft schedule talk is overplayed. Just for the baseball team, I assume.
Butch Huskey was one of our great names. RIP.
Hey gang of weather dudes! This week’s Phrase that Pays is, “Lol. There isn’t a map out there you won’t dispute.”
Dart Adams invented the run-on sentence.
Cakes are cooking for Bill Cleary, Renée Richards, Story Musgrave, Diana Muldaur, Jill St John, Jack Canfield, Ian Gillan, Bill Clinton, Gerald McRaney, Tipper Gore, Toshio Suzuki, John Deacon, Jonathan Frakes, Ned Yost, Peter Gallagher, Darryl Sutter, Ivan Neville, Ricky Pierce, Morten Andersen, Ron Darling, Valerie Kaprisky, Joey Tempest, John Stamos, Kevin Dillon, Kyra Sedgwick, Lee Ann Womack, Tabitha Soren, Mary Joe Fernandez, Michael Todd, J. J. Hardy, Christina Perri, Patrick Chung, Kirk Cousins, and Marcello Hernández.
That’s the funniest part of the Michael Holley video. Florio doesn’t care about Michael at all, he’s just upset the segment got fucked up.
The Pat MacAfee album is giving off ‘Matt and Ben wrote the Good Will Hunting script all by themselves’ vibes.
Aug 18, 1967. Tony C’s Cooperstown journey was de-railed. The Fenway silence as he lay at home plate was deafening.
The only time I was “dehydrated” I drove in to a MBTA pole.
How is it possible that Lindsay Clancy is more sane than most of the women supporting her?
Monasterio is a better Rusney Castillo.
Blue Line: Delays of about 15 minutes due to a maintenance train inspecting the overhead wires between Airport and Wonderland. Trains may stand by at stations.
There’s never been a positive news headline involving a quarry.
Sonny Gray is just a ball player.
I picture the McCourtys looking at each other during the game like, “should there be all this dead air?”
Glenn ‘Doc’ Rivers, now enshrined in the Naismith Basketball Hall of Fame.
Tommy John needing Tommy John surgery, the odds on that must have been astronomical. RIP.
I’ve heard that all the best radio personalities fight for the 9-11 Saturday morning shift. Almost as sought after as DJ Bean’s 6-7 AM Soccer show.
Lucy I like you but slow your role please.
It seemed like the Chiclets guys were letting RA dip his toe back in the brackish pod waters and he predictably goes and has 17 nips on a Monday. Many such cases.
Watching Tom Caron walk around the park peddling 50/50 tickets is not good television.
Gotta give credit to Sir Mix-A-Lot, he wrote hit songs that gave love to both big butts and big boobs!
Dr. Frasier Crane is a Hank McCoy variant.
What did Hayden Panettiere know about the Red Sox hacking Pitch Comm? Taken from us too soon.
Providence isn’t sending their best to wheel of fortune.
Are we still pretending Annie Agar is funny? Or can we stop? Tits don’t make you funny. Please be better.
Fun fact: Mama Scartelli, with her atrocious Boston accent, pronounces drawer as ‘draw’.
I had no specific animus towards that Conley guy, so RIP to him. But imagine being remembered as the curator of dongs.
Orange Line Reminder: August 20-30 Service will be suspended between Oak Grove and Back Bay for infrastructure upgrades. Use shuttle buses between Oak Grove and North Station. Use the Green Line between North Station and Copley/Back Bay. Commuter Rail alternatives are available.
That twisted fruit Jake 100% got his dog stuck down by Boston Harbor on purpose and called the news himself for attention. He then made sure to call into the Sports Hub to talk about it, too.
Aubrey Huff trying to play in the women’s baseball league yet?
Honk if you remember the Little Black Sambo Merry-Go-Round at Story Land.
One of the McCourty’s was pretty good doing color on Westwood One during the playoffs. I’m not sure which one because they all sound alike.
Nobody gonna take my car, I’m gonna race it to the ground Nobody gonna beat my car, it’s gonna break the speed of sound Ooh it’s a killing machine it’s got everything Like a driving power big fat tyres everything
I love it and I need it I bleed it Yeah it’s a wild hurricane Alright hold tight I’m a highway star…
Drizzilicious sounds like a fake gay rapper on The Boondocks.
I bet Rich Keefe cried. Again.
Michael Holley looks like RuPaul when the AIDS test came back.
Euthanizing those who genuinely enjoy Pat McAfee seems like the moderate position.
I love a good conspiracy theory as much as the next guy, but when did every bored housewife turn into Art Bell?
Turgeman is Israeli for Vrioni.
Eagles’ fourth quarterback is Cole Payton which sounds like what ChatGPT would answer if you asked it to create a name for a generic backup QB.
I am calling for a total and complete shutdown of white women watching murder trials until we can figure out what’s going on.
Pablo Sandoval was a Jimmy Fund captain? At least they got something out of him.
I look forward to Vrabel’s human shields becoming more outlandish as the season goes on. He’ll be juggling ALS patients while blindfolded by the end of the year.
Red Sox 2-0 on TV38 this season.
It’s odd that longtime Clippers season ticket holder Bill Simmons wants that story to go away.
Best bet for the weekend: Gonzo gets the bag!
“Bway-nos tahr-days, amigos! We all know how important the Jimmy Fund is, Don. Those kids need our help. But I got an even better idear: helpin’ my beauterful son Jared get outta prison. Look, he made a mistake, but the young lady there shouldn’t auhter have made him angry. It’s time to put aside the annermosity and bring my son home. BE SURE TO TEXT #FREEJARED TO THE NUMBAH ON YOUR SCREEN BELOW.”
Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Matt Vautour, Joe Giza, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. I got all the trouble I’m ever gonna need. And I just don’t want no more.
Doesn’t he just look right in the old Pat Patriot uniform, Craig?
By Vinny Jace, Special to the15net dot com:
New England has a history of dynamic tight ends who, in the barest sense, acted as security blankets for their quarterbacks. Of course, that is a criminally minimalist way to explain the contributions of Rob Gronkowski, Ben Coates, and Russ Francis. They could block, catch, run, and open up the game. They’re either enshrined in Canton, waiting for their gold jacket, or at worst qualified to be inducted into the Hall of Very Good (Coates).
Hunter Henry, now entering his age-32 season with the Patriots, likely won’t receive a gold jacket or be widely remembered. The fandom of this current Patriots team is centered on Drake Maye—and understandably so. Eventually someone who catches his spirals will become a Twitter darling to the hyper-online community. But that won’t be Henry. Something about how he plays, looks, and conducts himself doesn’t register. Yet on the field he’s been the team’s most dependable player in an era plagued by instability.
Thanks Bill.
Since Bill Belichick signed Henry in the rare Robert Kraft green-lit splurge of 2021, his quarterbacks have been plentiful and mostly bad: Mac Jones, Bailey Zappe, Jacoby Brissett, and then finally Maye. Despite that, his raw numbers never dipped, and he has compiled an impressive résumé over his five seasons in Foxborough.
In five years, Henry ranks among franchise tight ends third in receptions (259), fourth in yards (2,973), fourth in touchdowns (26), first in catch percentage (68.3%), and fourth in total games (81).
While Gronkowski excelled in the vertical game, Coates specialized in brute force across the middle, and Francis was a trailblazer in utilizing raw, imposing speed, Henry has exercised spatial awareness and acts as a high-IQ chain mover. He cannot duplicate the blocking ability of Gronkowski, though he does excel as a positional blocker, accumulating an above-average block win rate of 75.8%. Everything Henry does is in the shadows and easily forgotten.
On third downs he is primarily the safety blanket his quarterback will look to if things break down. Over his career, an elite 84.4% of his third-down receptions have resulted in a first down. In third-and-medium settings, Henry can use his football IQ to find and exploit soft spots in zone coverage.
He can use his body to shield off trailing defenders, giving Maye an open, low-risk window to throw into. Even when defenders lock down in man coverage on third down, Henry’s strong hands stand out. He ranked fourth among all tight ends with 13 contested catches last season.
In the red zone, Henry can find his way through traffic, boasting an impressive 63% catch rate inside the 20-yard line. Twenty-four of his touchdowns in a Patriots uniform have come from inside the red zone. What he does is actually similar to what A.J. Brown does, only from the inside rather than the outside.
Just recently he signed a two-year extension and will be expected to shoulder the brunt of the load at his position, as he has throughout his entire tenure. Co-stars at the position have come and gone: Jonnu Smith, Mike Gesicki, Austin Hooper, and now rookie Eli Raridon is expected to suit up next to him as the second tight end.
Henry represents dependability and leadership both on and off the field even as the team around him burned.
It’s all about Drake Maye in Foxborough. As it should be. And Brown eats up what little oxygen is left. Henry exists on the fringes, but when you look at what he’s meant to this franchise that’s been in flux, you can’t put a price on that level of peace of mind.
Vinny Jace is a special contributor to The15net.com.
The 15 