Pats may not get the bookend Lamar Hunt Trophy this season
By Vinny Jace, Special to the15net dot com:
2026 has been anything but a banner year for the New England Patriots. The defending AFC Champions will likely relinquish that title at year’s end, currently sitting at 5-4, two games behind the division-leading Buffalo Bills and a litany of teams nipping at their heels for the seventh and final playoff spot.
Entering Week 9, the Patriots’ starters have missed a combined 49 games due to injury, nearly doubling the league average of 25.5. Their inability to field a healthy unit rivals the Los Angeles Chargers (0-8), Washington Commanders (2-5-1), New Orleans Saints (3-5), Carolina Panthers (3-5), and Houston Texans (3-5).
Why the bottom hasn’t fallen out yet is beyond me. My guess is that, despite all the setbacks, Drake Maye has yet to miss a game, and the coaching triumvirate of Mike Vrabel, Josh McDaniels, and Zak Kuhr has been excellent. Let’s not forget offensive line coach Doug Marrone, who is coaching a unit missing Mike Onwenu, Ben Brown, Morgan Moses, and Greg Van Roten. Over the last three weeks, they’ve played castoffs like Matt Pryor and Walter Rouse, and the results have been as expected.
While there are legitimate concerns and mistakes made when constructing this roster, what has primarily led to the downfall of the Patriots is bad luck. If their health suddenly turns around, they’ll be right back in the thick of things, especially since they’re missing critical pieces on the interior and skill-position players in A.J. Brown and Romeo Doubs. The remaining games on their schedule are daunting, to say the least. They face the Detroit Lions (6-2), the aforementioned winless Chargers, the Buffalo Bills (7-1), the Minnesota Vikings with Kirk Cousins now under center (6-2), the Kansas City Chiefs with Josh Downs now lining up on the outside (6-2), the New York Jets (2-7), and the Denver Broncos (7-2), before finishing with the lowly Miami Dolphins (1-7).
This is the meat and potatoes of their first-place schedule. There is still time to turn the ship around; it’s only a matter of whether the cavalry can arrive in time.
L, W, L, W, W, W, L, W, L, ???
Vinny Jace is a special contributor to The15net.com.
Look at me! I’m an old human and I can pick winners in football! PBBBBLLLLTH!!
Can YOU pick more winners than our own Football Cat? If so, you become eligible to win prizes! Football Cat went 11-3 for the week! Whereas Warren Dull’s Aunt didn’t make the right pick on the Sunday Morning game in Spain, or the Monday Night Football tilt, but she did correctly pick winners in the intervening twelve games! Amazing!
How to play? Simply pick who you think will win this weekend’s games. (Sunday and Monday only) Pick more winners than Football Cat, and you can win your choice of either a The15 Inside Joke Prize Pack, a $25 Ninety Nine Restaurant Gift Card, a $25 Amazon Gift Card, or a $25 Supermarket Gift Card! Your choice as to Market Basket, Big Y, Shaw’s, or Stop & Shop! (Or another, if you are outside the New England Area)
Fluff, CITCO shirt, & your choice of KENO hat! That’s a prize pack!
(One winner per week. In the event of a tie, a winner may be chosen at random. Winners remain eligible to also win in future weeks.)
Here are this weekend’s NFL matchups:
Patriots at Lions
Chiefs at Falcons
Texans at Browns
Dolphins at Colts
Vikings at Packers
Panthers at Saints
Bills at Jets
Jaguars at Titans
Rams at Cardinals
Seahawks at Raiders
49ers at Cowboys
Steelers at Bengals
Chargers at Ravens (Tiebreaker – total points scored)
Email your picks to bjbsjournalintern@gmail.com (prior to kickoff of the first listed game) or, if that isn’t how you roll, post them on the Twitter and our now veteran group of interns will make sure your entry is added to this week’s pool of contestants!
And good luck to all our contestants!
You have had an impressive run of luck Miss Dull, if that is your name. Pity you don’t have extra lives to spare.
Oktoberfest may have given way to Novemberfest, but don’t put away your lederhosen just yet. YOUR New England Patriots have landed in the Bavarian capital of Munich, Germany!
Whether you’re going to putsch your way to your local beer hall, or enjoy the game in the comfort of your own home, here are a few German words you should be shouting at your television:
Frühzuckung: A false start. Literally “early twitching.”
Blitzkriegschmeiß: A desperate pass while under pressure. Literally “lightning war fling.”
Pflanzenfresser: When a player gets slammed to the turf. Literally “plant eater.”
Speckpanzer: When the ball carrier runs over people. Literally “bacon tank.”
Butterfingerflüch: If AJ Brown drops a wide-open pass. Literally “Butterfinger curse.”
Schweineierkatastrophe: If Drake Maye throws a terrible interception. Literally “pig-egg catastrophe.”
Kniescheibenbeißer: Dan Campbell. Literally “kneecap-biter.”
Der Orchideen-Handarbeits-Milliardär: Robert Kraft. Literally “the orchid handwork billionaire.”
Badezuber-Betrüger: Mike Vrabel. Literally “Wooden-hot-tub cheater.”
Aufgeblähter-Einaugen-Kokser: Scott Zolak. Literally “bloated one-eyed coke head.”
Viel Spaß beim Spiel!
He’s growing it for Movember
Sunday Frühstück Time Patriots at Lions(-2.5) Joseph Vroebbels pregame pep talk rallies the Patriots
Nun, Volk, steh auf, und Sturm, brich los!
Sunday Lunch Time Chiefs(-3.5) at Falcons Chefs cook Atlanta’s wings
You’re not you when you’re hungry for wings
Texans(-4.5) at Browns Houston shelves elves
Brownie!
Dolphins at Colts(-3.5) Miami out tanks Indy (Colts win)
At least everyone got to Gronk spike all weekend long, that’s what really matters.
I hope Jaylen’s Oriental harpist plays him something uplifting.
Really enjoying the fanz who demanded Gonzo “get the bag” now calling him spoiled and checked out.
That was just Niko being Niko.
I’m not sure Drake Maye knows there are safeties on the field.
When Embiid retires someday they will have a 20-minute tribute video of nothing but free throws.
Hand up I don’t know what a Blind Item is.
The production quality on Dianna Russini’s new show is a tick better than an Al Qaeda cave video.
The X app is terrible. It’s gotten so difficult to curate my timeline down to strictly tweets featuring phallic weather gauges.
Cakes are cooking for Warner Wolf, Vince Martell, Mutt Lange, Kathy Postlewait, Jim Peterik, Paul Cowsill, Marshall Crenshaw, Ian Craig Marsh, Lee Haney, Peter Parros, Stanley Tucci, Demi Moore, Mic Michaeli, Calista Flockhart, Roberto Hernandez, Bill Musgrave, Lin Elliott, Dave Moore, David DeLuise, Melvin Tuten, Adam Beach, Steve Konowalchuk, Jason Bowen, Leonardo DiCaprio, G. Reid Wiseman, Jason Grilli, Willie Parker, Natalie Glebova, Brittny Gastineau, Lil’ Dave, Matt Garza, Victor Cruz, Christa B. Allen, and Trey Smith.
Hold on. I was just watching “Have I Got News For You” and I just saw Jeffery Toobin is still on CNN? I thought we ousted that guy for snapping his carrot on a Zoom call!
I hate football, but I LOVE arguing about what’s a catch. Anyone else in the same boat?
Somewhere a divorced regional sales manager just bought a quarter-zip and decided to make it everybody’s problem.
Who schedules back surgery during football season? Was it brought on by chronic booster seat usage?
I think I’m going to exclusively greet people by tapping their leg from here on out.
Hey gang of over sharers, this week’s Phrase that Pays is, “Thank you very much. You’re done.”
Looks like the shitty chili and Coors Light didn’t work Sunday, huh?
Did Mahomes lock his twink brother in the basement or sum i haven’t heard from buddy in years.
Is Danny Ainge ever expected to win in Utah or does he just get to pretend he’s rebuilding and collecting assets for the next 10 years?
I would actually rather die than ever find myself a slave of someone else’s college football team’s schedule again.
Lions players showing up in Jack Campbell jerseys. I think somebody is chopping onions in my house rn.
Let’s review: Pete Sheppard is a cocktail waitress, Mikey Adams drives for Uber, Gerry gets an allowance from the guy who fucks his sister. All of a sudden pumping gas and bagging groceries for the radio men doesn’t sound all that bad!
Was there any mention of Russini’s husband or Vrabel’s kid in the big story?
Red Line Update: Braintree Branch service is delayed about 15 minutes due to an earlier disabled train at Harvard.
The alpha move is make eye contact.
I truly do not care about re-litigating an 8-year-old sandpaper cheating saga in Australian Cricket. It just seems so boring to go over the details again when three dudes got suspended already and we’ve gone through a whole next era of cricket for both Australia and South Africa.
Do you think AJ Brown’s Patriots career consisting of 3 games and 9 receptions will be a learning experience for the weaponzz faction of Patriots fans? Never mind, I already know that answer.
You can tell a lot about a person by how they treat a hotel breakfast waffle iron.
Somehow the pocket pussies and Jenna Jameson name drop was the least offensive part of Koutouvides’ speech. can’t believe he described Aaron fucking Hernandez molding them like a mouth guard.
Imagine making a vest your signature look.
The voice actor reading the audiobook I’m listening to’s black lady’s voice is indistinguishable from everyone from WEEI’s Ordway impression and now I can’t unhear it.
I can’t stand to see you sad I can’t bear to hear you cry If you can’t tell me what you need All I can do is wonder why.
Someday, someway, aw Someday, someway, yeah, now Someday, someway Maybe I’ll understand you.
This whole time I thought Sharia Law was a WNBA player.
I love that Jaylen models himself as some kind of samurai, stoically going about his craft. In actuality, he plays with the demeanor of a teacher’s aide who just discovered the two retarded kids sucking each other’s dicks in the janitor’s closet.
I’ll look at the offensive tape tomorrow. Can only handle so much pain on one day.
We are happy to report that missing person, Rayjay Strikeswithagun, has been located safe. Thank you for helping by sharing the message!
Russini must fuck like a porn star given she’s not that good looking and has a terrible personality and is Italian.
Hey NBAonNBC, next time could you have a sense of the moment and not immediately grab Tatum for an interview so we could see what would happen with Brown?
We all know they jailed Russell Brand for his political views right? Also, for the raping.
Finding a good tattoo artist in Florida where there’s seemingly one every few blocks shouldn’t be this difficult but alas…here we are.
I’m not dealing with Vrabel’s mustache all month.
People need to realize that the entire reason women’s sports exist as a separate category from men’s sports is because men were afraid that women could be better than them at something.
So worried how Curry and Durant greet each other tonight. Couldn’t sleep all night.
Imagine double-teaming the DUNE: PART 3 popcorn bucket with your best friend Niko Koutouvides and then he constantly brings it up unprompted at public gatherings.
Honk if you remember ‘One on One: Dr. J vs. Larry Bird.’
Xfinity Mobile Arena is one of those too-many-sound-effects venues. It feels like the production guy is afraid of having just basketball sounds. Having Mr. Burns saying “Exxxxcellent” after every basket gets old.
That Texas fumble/forward pass thing is the most obviously fixed play I’ve seen in college football in a few weeks.
PJ row row row your boat aggressively to nowhere .merrily merrily merrily merrily..you’re a bag of hot air.
Is it good when you’re getting regular EKGs in your early 30’s?
Doctor Doom’s team is going to absolutely obliterate the Avengers, X-Men, etc. – this is gonna be like the 2017-18 Golden State Warriors against a High School JV team.
I’m a little worried the Philadelphia Board of Elections is going discover a box in the trunk of a car containing 25 more free throw attempts for the Sixers.
Best bet for the weekend: Headed off to my gym in Norwell for a squatting contest against that Andy Mike guy. Ill talk to you guys later.
I knew Jaylen’s hairline was getting more and more unrealistic, but this is ridiculous.
Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Joe Giza, Matt Vautour, and the members of #the15 were used in this column.Today is actually a good day to thank a veteran for their service.
And happy birthday to Australian/American actress and model Lisa Gleave, perhaps best known as a Barker’s Beauty on The Price Is Right, and Briefcase Model #3 on Deal or No Deal.
Can YOU pick more winners than our own Football Cat? If so, you become eligible to win prizes! Football Cat picked 8 winners against 5 losers, none too shabby. But not enough outdo a new winning contestant Mike, who went 9-4! Wow!
How to play? Simply pick who you think will win this weekend’s games. (Sunday and Monday only) Pick more winners than Football Cat, and you can win your choice of either a The15 Inside Joke Prize Pack, a $25 Ninety Nine Restaurant Gift Card, a $25 Amazon Gift Card, or a $25 Supermarket Gift Card! Your choice as to Market Basket, Big Y, Shaw’s, or Stop & Shop! (Or another, if you are outside the New England Area)
Fluff, CITCO shirt, & your choice of KENO hat!
(One winner per week. In the event of a tie, a winner may be chosen at random. Winners remain eligible to also win in future weeks.)
Here are this weekend’s NFL matchups:
Bengals at Falcons
Broncos at Panthers
Cowboys at Colts
Jets at Chiefs
Lions at Dolphins
Browns at Saints
Giants at Eagles
Rams at Commanders
Texans at Chargers
Raiders at 49ers
Packers at Patriots
Cardinals at Seahawks
Buccaneers at Bears
Bills at Vikings (Tiebreaker – total points scored)
Email your picks to bjbsjournalintern@gmail.com (prior to kickoff of the first listed game) or, if that isn’t how you roll, post them on the Twitter and our stellar group of interns will make sure your entry is added to this week’s pool of contestants!
Fun cat fact of the week: In the 11th century, Madrid was under Arabic domain, and a very high wall was built around the city to defend it from Christian invaders. In 1085, the Christian troops of King Alfonso VI approached the wall under cover of darkness. One of his soldiers managed to climb the city wall by inserting his dagger between gaps in the stones as foot-holds. His fellow soldiers began calling him “Gato” because he climbed the wall with the agility of a cat. To commemorate this feat, that soldier and his descendants assumed the name of “Gato”. That is why all Madrileños are referred to as “Gatos”.
However to be considered a true “Gato” you must have been born in Madrid, and both your parents must have been born in Madrid, and all four of your grandparents must have born in Madrid. Otherwise you are, as the kids would say, a larper.
The inverse rule applies to “Italian” and “Irish” Americans
Sunday Breakfast Time Bengals (-3) at Falcons Los gatos atigrados muelen a palos el pene
Sunday Lunch Time Broncos (-2.5) at Panthers Black Cats bust Broncos
A cat called Horse
Cowboys (-6) at Colts Cowboys corral Colts
Jets at Chiefs (-9.5) Natives knock Knickerbockers
Lions (-7) at Dolphins Felines feast on Flipper
Fish are food not friends
Browns at Saints (-1.5) Sheduer shreds Saints
Giants (-3.5) at Eagles G-men win the Shukri Wrights Bowl
This could be a Pierre Nightmare
Rams (-5.5) at Commanders Blue wave swamps the Pinkos
Sunday Dinner Time Texans (-4.5) at Chargers Chargers are powerless
The anhedonia is real!
Raiders at 49ers (-9.5) Niners roll Raiders
Packers at Patriots (-2.5) Maye beats Meatmen
It’s almost an anagram for: “Man beats Maye’s meat”
Cardinals at Seahawks (-10.5) Seattle wins bird battle
Sunday Prowl Time Buccaneers at Bears (-6) Bears bounce Bucs
Bouncing bears
Monday Prowl Time Bills (-2.5) at Vikings Buffalo wings Norsemen
Football Cat lives in New Hampshire, enjoys watching football, and is a cat.
An elegant ballpark feature from a more civilized age.
Congratulations to the Brewers! Well done. I do feel bad for Dick Vitale and the Rays’ other fan.
Jaylen Brown is like a pick-me girl if the targeted audience was black dudes with Asian cartoons as their profile pics.
How poor and strung out do you have to be to have mismatching plasticware?
Sounds like Henderson might have had the “Foxboro Flu” last weekend.
Hey honey, for Halloween I think I’ll go as that famously flamboyantly gay guy who’s known for exercising, you know as a joke.
Thank you, Veronica Burton, for doing your part in preventing Owen Pence from crowing about Angel Reese.
You never see a white guy named Malik.
You just know Andy Reid and Brett Veach have Henry Ruggs III’s mandatory parole date circled on their calendars.
I’ve never seen Ernest Scared Stupid. I’m fixing that right now.
Finding out for the first time in 2026 that Bruce Springsteen is a liberal has shocked me to my core.
Cakes are coking for Delbert McClinton, Marlene Jobert, Jacques Villeneuve the Elder, Chris Difford, Peter Boynton, Jeff Probst, Ralph Macchio, Michel Therrien, Kool Rock-ski, Petra Verkaik, Eric Karros, Carlos Baerga, Matthew McConaughey, Puff Daddy, Russell Copeland, Orlando Pace, Larry Bigbie, Vince Wilfork, Devin Hester, and Dez Bryant.
Miami needs to be ranked #1 so if Notre Dame beats them ESPN can make the argument that they beat one good team.
I thought Achilles was the face of Achilles injuries.
Joe Mazzulla has never understood the phrase “double-edged sword.” “Aren’t all swords double-edged?” he said.
Zolak made an analogy to that Maye sack to “back when on the Mass Poke they had ticket turnstiles, now you just use the Sun Pass”. What?
I don’t think mastering one thing and then moving on to the next thing is a hallmark of ADHD.
Red Sox just traded the owner of the first cycle in WooSox history.
Can the Pope dunk?
Football is just a very retarded sport to try to capture statistically in so many ways. “Nice 1 yard TD run, loser. Your YPC just took a hit.”
The thing I’ll always remember from Patrick Stewart is him saying that, coming from a Shakespearean background, he was the only one on the set of TNG who knew what to with your hands when you have no pockets: Nothing. Genuinely helpful as an autistic and a trans woman both.
Mayfield had a higher rating than Penix? How is 0-3 for 0 not a 0?
A computer took your job Daddy.
Charlie McAvoy got two separate penalties eight seconds apart. That’s hard to do.
Kaylee Hartung; was her dad a G.I.?
I really enjoy Andrew Catalon. That thing on top of his head, less so.
Hey gang, this week’s Phrase that Pays is, “She looks bendy, and willing to try stuff.”
NBA Cup Tonight!!! Said no one ever Bob Hearts Abishola Energy.
Felger smelling his own jizz seems on pointe.
A Pete Blackburn mention means more to me than it should and yes I am embarrassed writing that.
Imagine double-teaming the DUNE: PART 3 popcorn bucket with your best friend and then never speaking about it again.
I don’t know if modern day Celtics fans can appreciate how important Delonte was to the mid 2000s teams and putting the team into position to get KG and Ray. His “wiyahh hangaahhh” ad for Fox Sports New England is legendary.
Logan Ryan has a sneaky good white guy sounding voice.
Green Line: Due to signal upgrades, there will be no service between North Station & Babcock St (B), Cleveland Circle (C), Kenmore (D), & Heath St (E) Nov 7 – 15. Use buses to Copley/Back Bay. Use Orange Line between Back Bay & North Station.
Fan Duel with The NFL Logo next to It is disgusting. Bert Bell is rolling in his grave. He went To his grave after he Dropped Dead.
Wow, Mut really pussies out talking about Mike Adams.
I feel like it’s been all downhill for Vivek ever since he got Josh’s endorsement.
That AJ Brown trade is looking better and better each day.
The Mrs. is noticing the grocery bills have been increasing outside of inflation. She’s yet to discover the correlation between the money spent and the convoluted recipes she sends me to make on TikTok. Stay tuned.
News Item: Lights is in a poly relationship with Anthony from Smosh.
Feels like the Patriots could have gotten Jared Wilson a helmet cover that is the same color as the regular helmets.
I don’t recall asking for a Temu Tim Burton Ebeneezer Scrooge movie.
Imagine that annoying sports TV guy if he had the mentions of that annoying sports TV girl. Crazy stuff!
He fell down.
The Gilded Age is peak TV and I’m glad it’s back. One of the only shows I will make time to watch as close to “live” as possible.
At my bedside empty pocket, A foot without a sock. Your body gets much closer, I fumble for the clock Alarmed, by the seduction I wish that it would stop.
Tempted by the fruit of another. Tempted, but the truth is discovered. What’s been going on, Now that you have gone. There’s no other, Tempted by the fruit of another, Tempted, but the truth is discovered.
Coach Vrabes looks like crap. The mini bye week with his wife must have been fun.
Flo stays in his bag.
Lexington High’s Sal Frelick: World Series champion. Newton South High’s Veronica Burton: WNBA champion. Two kids from Massachusetts who defied the odds. You can do it, too. Believe in yourself.
Honk if you remember Left Shark.
Missing my ex-boyfriend from two boyfriends ago who thought a force to be reckoned with was “a force to be wrecking with” and said it constantly.
Joe Fagnano pronounces his name, “Fan-Yano”?
I would like to see the language in Jaylen’s contract that allows him to go skydiving. I will wait.
Sources: The Patriots will not be in for real on Jonathan Taylor, but if a team that recently lost their MVP caliber QB makes their RB who used to play for Vrabel available, which is possible, keep your eyes peeled.
I would be more interested in Platinum Glove Awards if the winners had to dye their hair platinum.
Had to open the emergency backup ‘Dots, Tootsie Pops & Tootsie Rolls’ bag for the last bunch of trick or treaters.
I got got. Bam did not dress up as A’ja for Halloween. Damn AI.
L.L. Bean boots are dogshit in snow and ice, but people have been psyoped into thinking they need them.
When does analytics revert to the mean?
For three weeks I thought I had anhedonia. Turns out I was just really bored.
Best bet for the weekend: Coors Light and shitty chili.
A Bruin is a bear. Some bears are brown. Voila!
Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Joe Giza, Matt Vautour, and the members of #the15 were used in this column.How long has this been going on?
And happy birthday to (checks notes) reality TV personality and poker player Trishelle Cannatella.
Can YOU pick more winners than our own Football Cat? If so, you become eligible to win prizes! Football Cat went 7-6, which is more winners than losers, which would be fine except for Warren Dull’s Aunt going 8-5. She might be part cat!
Mrowr.
How to play? Simply pick who you think will win this weekend’s games. (Sunday and Monday only) Pick more winners than Football Cat, and you can win your choice of either a The15 Inside Joke Prize Pack, a $25 Ninety Nine Restaurant Gift Card, a $25 Amazon Gift Card, or a $25 Supermarket Gift Card! Your choice as to Market Basket, Big Y, Shaw’s, or Stop & Shop! (Or another, if you are outside the New England Area)
Prizes! Wheeeee!!
(One winner per week. In the event of a tie, a winner may be chosen at random. Winners remain eligible to also win in future weeks.)
Here are this weekend’s NFL matchups:
Ravens at Bills
Titans at Bengals
Cardinals at Cowboys
Vikings at Lions
Colts at Jaguars
Raiders at Jets
Browns at Steelers
Falcons at Buccaneers
Chargers at Rams
Chiefs at Broncos
Patriots at Dolphins
Eagles at Commanders
Bears at Seahawks (Tiebreaker – total points scored)
Email your picks to bjbsjournalintern@gmail.com (prior to kickoff of the first listed game) or, if that isn’t how you roll, post them on the Twitter and our spoopy group of interns will make sure your entry is added to this week’s pool of contestants!
Our Intern Street Team was out and about asking the locals, “What are you going as for Halloween?” And lucky us, some of the kids wore their costumes to a trunk-or-treat event!
Benjamin F. – “63 hard boiled eggs.”
Jimmy Biscotti, Uber Driver – “Dunning Kreuger.”
Mo Sylvan, Musician – “Steve Buckley carrying an urn containing Donnie Beardsley’s ashes.”
Vance Fox, Student – “$5,000 of special milk.”
Gretl Hauptmann, Dental Assistant- “The New York Times 4th Down Bot.”
Samuel E. – “A failed comedian with multiple dead brothers.”
