The 15

Who told Jaylen to handle this situation using his left hand?

Tanner Jeannot is a monster.

Oh, so Michael Felger gets to enjoy watching his hometown team compete for a championship in peace, but that courtesy isn’t reciprocated?

The League ought to reel in all the extravagant Celebrations. It borders on the Ridiculous. Everything is a takeoff on Michael Jackson’s Thriller.

Theory: The darker the helmet color, the gayer the mushroom helmet looks.

Glad I’ve been right about Jaylen Brown for a decade. He did a whole semester at Berkley he’s so smart!!! Guy is a fucking moron. He’s probably dumber than the average NBA guy because at least the rest of ’em know they hit the genetic lottery and leave it at that. Kyrie YouTube University Extension School attendee.

There’s no Crying in Baseball or On Planes.

To my neighbors to the north, is the Calgary tower worth checking out, or just a tourist trap?

“Tatum needs to watch his tone to manage the other guy’s emotions better” makes a lot more sense when you think about Karalis’s personal life.

Al Michaels can barely conceal his disdain for Amazon Prime shows.

If the Colts are having a fire sale, Grover Stewart is the player I’m most interested in.

Dan Orlovsky may be a bit of a dullard.

Cakes are cooking for Jane Alexander, Dennis Franz, Annie Potts, Bill Gates, Stephen Morris, Daphne Zuniga, Kevin Dineen, Lauren Holly, Jamie Gertz, Steve Atwater, Julia Roberts, Ben Harper, Brad Paisley, Terrell Davis, Joaquin Phoenix, Gwendoline Christie, Matt Smith, Finn Wittrock, Frank Ocean, Nolan Gould, and Stephen Nedoroscik.

I don’t think the extra loud cheering when Robinson makes a FT is helpful to him. Stop giving him the retard treatment.

Of course Lucy Burdge thinks Jaylen is handling this just fine, he’s acting like a woman.

Does anybody know if Anthony Edwards got hurt?

Howie Carr looked disgusting–nipples protruding–in his blue shirt before the “Thank You For Voting” sign. Very very disrespectful.

Notre Dame. What a life. Play nobody, lose any time you actually play someone good, stay ranked in the top 5.

Go catch your own cod dummy.

Hey gang, this week’s Phrase that pays is, “I don’t want to be the face of tearing your fuckin Achilles.”

You know in science fiction movies when they put space explorers in suspended animation so they can survive wicked long travel? I needed that trying to go west on the Mass Pike last night.

‘Lamb chops and gravy’ has some real, ‘the owl has lost his goat!’ energy.

Yo Pacers, let’s not play Kesha’s “Die Young” during the Peyton Manning Children’s Hospital Teddy Bear Toss please and thanks.

Green Line: Due to signal modernization work there will be no service between North Station & Babcock St (B), Kenmore (C+D), & Heath St (E) Oct 31 – Nov 1. Use buses for service to Copley/Back Bay. Use Orange Line between Back Bay & North Station.

Dustin May looks like someone fucked around with the create a player feature.

Yucky bad man Karalis once accused the Celtics of shitting on Heinsohn’s legacy because they got their asses kicked right after he passed away.

Jaylen vs Jayson reminds me of The Office. You just can’t make edgy comedies like that anymore.

I had a busy day once I eventually woke up Laura.

Was there ever a better opening to a Top 40 song than Martha and the Vandellas’ “Heat Wave?”

THEY get to gloat when a Boston team loses an early season game. YOU are overreacting to a tiny sample size when you enjoy an early season win.

Cam Skattebo is an 80s movie character.

The Celtics Post Game Show is longer than Rocky 1,2,3,4,5,6

News Item: Chrishell Stause announces split from G Flip after 4 years.

Cabbage is such an underappreciated vegetable.

I believe Scal. Also #FireScal.

When I look over my shoulder
What do you think I see?
Some other cat lookin’ over
His shoulder at me
And he’s strange
Sure is strange

You got to pick up every stitch
You got to pick up every stitch, yeah
Beatniks are out to make it rich
Oh no, must be the season of the witch
Must be the season of the witch, yeah
Must be the season of the witch.

I was driving a little too fast down Washington Street in Canton, Massachusetts this morning when a police cruiser pulled out of the cemetery being me… I thought I was cooked.

Like we don’t remember all the Chiefs fans divided into two camps; whether Mahomes would beat Brady’s Super Bowl records in eight seasons, or the conservative faction that thought it might take nine.

Treveyon Henderson couldn’t find a hole if he was having sex with Bonnie Blue.

Lucy pulling the I know more because I’m in sports with this topic is right up there with Brie Pirre telling Asante Samuel she gets paid to talk football, therefore she’s right.

Can’t believe there’s an all new Cupertino this Thursday on CBS and Paramount Plus.

Honk if you remember Bobby Orr scoring the final goal of his career on this day in 1978.

I’m baffled by people who retire and keep shitposting on LinkedIn. Like being a soulless corporate husk wasn’t just an act?

Underrated moment is DanO asking McAfee if he knows what it means and he goes “yeah percentile. It’s Greek.”

Jaylen Brown fans talk about him like he’s Dr. Sebi.

I don’t trust a man who says “we’ll circle back” without looking like he’s ever completed a circle.

They should make more Nick Saban commercials.

Best bet for the weekend: three more games to act as a referendum of the Jaylen/Jayson question.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Joe Giza, Matt Vautour, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. Love is kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you. Spooky.