Football Cat’s Week 1 NFL Picks ’25

Posted on September 5, 2025 by naop Leave a comment

Football Cat is tired from watching the Patriotic Birds play the Pokes.

Your long wait is finally over, and so is your Summah, football season is upon us! And this season is no ordinary season… this season YOU (yes, YOU!) get the opportunity to go head to head with our very own Feline Football Forecaster, the one, the only Football Cat!

One of our interns (I haven’t taken time to learn their names yet) outlined the rules in an earlier post.

The Cliff Notes version: If you can pick more winners than Football Cat you will be eligible to win a fabulous The15 Inside Joke Prize Pack! Email your picks to bjbsjournalintern@gmail.com (prior to kickoff of tonight’s game) and our plucky squad of interns will make sure your entry is added to this week’s pool of contestants! It’s that easy. All you have to lose is your self respect.

Which leaves us with the question… Can YOU beat Football Cat?

Sexta à Noite Prowl Time
Chiefs (-3) vs Chargers
“I play the beautiful game while I’m in Brazil
‘Cause everybody plays the beautiful game while I’m in Brazil
‘Cause it’s all we’ve ever wanted, and it’s all that you want still
Don’t you wanna play the beautiful game out in Brazil?”

Plugs shock Chiefs in the Southern Hemisphere’s Winter Classic

Pelé knew which game was the *real o jogo bonito*

Sunday Lunch Time
Buccaneers (-2) at Falcons
An opening week NFC South six pointer! Why wasn’t this on Sunday Night Football? Bucs win and all but clinch the division

Bengals (-6) at Browns
Stripey cats leave the Browns strewn across their litter box

Actually Cleveland is a really nice place… for me to poop on!

Dolphins at Colts (-1.5)
Ponies pop Porps

Panthers at Jaguars (-3)
Cat fight! Spotted cats send black cats home with two black eyes

Raiders at Patriots (-2.5)
Botox Brady’s team comes up short in the shadow of Tom’s tiny headed statue

Cardinals (-6.5) at Saints
Cardinals win the Holy War

Say two Hail Marys and one Act of Cat-trition (*uproarious laughter*)

Steelers (-3) at Jets
Men of Steel dominate in Metropolis

Krypto, Krytpo, Krypto! Why no love for Streaky the Supercat?

Giants at Commanders (-6)
I’m calling the president. Mr. President, we need the National Guard. We need as many men as you can spare because the Commanders are killing the Giants. Wait… what? They’re already here? Never mind.