Author Archives: Dicey15

The 2023 Big Sads Region ‘N’ Preview

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Ben Volin (1) versus Chris Curtis (2) It has been a true banner year of idiocy for The Globe’s Senior NFL Writer.  He (probably) has control of his twitter back and (probably) doesn’t have real sources so anything less than a complete blowout versus the slug from the morning show will be a shocker.

Karen Guregian (8) versus Mark Dondero (9) Look for the perennial up-and-comer and friend of the program, Dondy, to pull the mild upset over the reliable Guregian on the strength of his Tatum Clutch Gene Takes he’s been working on in the lab.

Andrew Callahan (5) versus Joe Murray (12) The real life “Crying Wojak” Meme guy should win his first round match up with the other half(ton) of the Bankroll Boys running away (in lieu of rascal’ing away).

Trenni Kusnierek (4) versus Nick Cattles (13) The Sacramento Kid is poised to pull the upset on the perpetually offended Trenni by throwing his lot in with previous winner Greg Bedard.  Is Bedard looking at a repeat by proxy?

Alex Reimer (6) versus Evan Lazar (11) No amount of Yankee concepts or allied word salads is going to knock off the media columnist, or whatever the Pissant is doing now.  He’s established a pedigree of sadness that will make round 1 a formality.

Fred Toucher (3) versus Christian Arcand (14) Fred has lost his mind as many times as the Reverend has lost his job.  Hitching his wagon to JV Felger doesn’t help Arcand overcome the sheer power of the Morning Zoo.

Rich Keefe (7) versus Peter Abraham (10) Eventually EEI will find the right timeslot to leverage Keefe’s talents.  Until then expect him to squeak by the Red Sox beat version of the Charlie Brown rain cloud.

Dan Shaughnessy (2) versus Ron Borger (15) This is the emeritus matchup for the tourney.  Years and years of misery and sadness and plagiarism from Ron essentially relegated to a footnote.  No idea what fly-by-night outfit employs him at this point so expect Shank to win in a cake-walk.  Reality for Dan is that anything less than the title this year is a disappointment.

BET with Dicey15 – Week 8 NFL Picks

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An astute reader noticed that I was 100% on the 1 PM games last week. $$$$. Also an editorial note, the return percentages posted last week should have been 275% and 1830% as I forgot to multiply by 100. Last weeks returns: 500% on the week, 2200% YTD.

BET in bold:

Broncos +1.5/Jaguars -1.5 – Ye Olde, Russ Wilson.

Steelers +10.5/Eagles -10.5 – Pittsburg takes Philly phans down a peg by covering.

Patriots -2.5/Jets +2.5 – Pats recover from their Monday Night trap game fiasco. Whoever QBs owns.

Raiders -1.5/Saints +1.5 – Have the haters apologize to Taysom Hill yet?

Cardinals +3.5/Vikings -3.5 – Say “Nuke Hopkins” more.

Dolphins -3.5/Lions +3.5 – Lions pull off the straight upset against Hardo Campell’s old team. BET.

Bears +10/Cowboys -10 – Justin (I call him that as 5th generation Big10) keeps the cover train rolling, bro.

Panthers +4/Falcons -4 – The Panthers continue to prove that YOUR super weapon RB is irrelevant.

Titans +1/Texans -1 – Titans play like shit and commit a bunch of dumb penalties but Coach Vrabes pulls it out (no offense, Josh Primo).

49ers -1/Rams +1 – Which coach here is the current golden boy?

Comanders +3/Colts -3 – I doubt Snyder and Irsay will be sharing a post game hooker after this one.

Giants +3.5/Seahawks -3.5 – Geno revenge game.

Packers +10.5/Bills – 10.5 – They should play this game in December. #ColdAsFuck

MONDAY NIGHT SPECIAL

Bengals -3.5/Browns +3.5 – Burrows is back, baby!

PROP OF THE WEEK

I am on DeVonta Smith OVER 55.5 receiving yards against the porous Steelers secondary. Especially after a different DeVonta (sic) killed the over for me last week.

BET with Dicey15 – Week 7 NFL BET(s)

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Last weeks picks went 9-3-1. This is pretty easy when you understand that referees use very specific techniques to get teams in trouble early… pass interference, phantom holding, etc. Up 27.5% on the week, +183% YTD. Tom Brady did let me down, but he’s getting divorced and looks like a Jack Skellington cosplayer so I’ll let it slide this time.

BET in Bold:

Falcons +6.5/Bengals -6.5 – I have no idea who the Falcons coach is.

Lions +6.5/Cowboys -6.5 – Jerry Jones and RKK exchanged words, RKK exchanged vows with a women who totally loves him.

Colts +2.5/Titans – 2.5 – Irsay wants to oust Synder for gross ethical malpractice. What a world.

Packers -4.5/Commandeers +4.5 – Wentz is out, Rodgers is still not out.

Buccaneers -13/Panthers +13 – Bonus bet, which is greater: The number of practices Brady skipped this week or Offensive teammates he yells at on Sunday?

Giants -3/Jagwires +3 – I’ll say it. Trevor Lawrence looks like a girl.

Browns +6.5/Ravens -6.5 – No love lost between these rivals who are kind of the same franchise but not really.

Texans +6.5/Raiders -6.5 – This would have been the battle of former New England anonymous source yappers if Easterby hadn’t be unceremoniously let go to pursue a career in stand-up comedy/selling Jesus themed inspirational desk calendars.

Seahawks +4.5/Chargers -4.5 – Is Carroll ever going to let someone cook?

Chiefs -1/49ers +1 – Hey did you know Christian McAfree’s dad played for Kyle Shanahan’s dad? Interesting.

Steelers +7.5/Dolphins -7.5 – Swaggy genius head coach has his team well below sea level in Miami when it comes to point differential. I’m taking Swaggy non-genius head coach to win outright. BET.

MONDAY NIGHT SPECIAL –

Bears +8/Patriots -8 – Bears cover but Patriots win. We learn nothing.

PROP BET OF THE WEEK

I love OVER 81.5 receiving yards for Davante Adams. Raiders have to get all they can out of him before he’s thrown in prison for lightly shoving a misplaced camera person.

BET with Dicey15 – Week 6 NFL BET(s)

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Welcome to the world of quasi-legal sports betting!** We here at the15 noticed a dearth of gambling content on the internet and saw an opportunity to expand the #brand to include completely well thought out NFL betting advice*. Apologies for missing the first 5 weeks but there were extensive negotiations including emails and multiple phone interviews required to bring this to you.

BET in bold:

49ers -5.5/Falcons +5.5 – Falcons stink right?

Pats -1.5/Browns +1.5 – This one will be over faster than a Deshaun Watson massage and far less messy

Jets +7.5/Packers -7.5 – Jets cover in the battle of QBs with family issues

Jags +7/Colts -7 PUSH – Who the hell even cares

Vikings +3/Dolphins – 3 – Have more concussed QBs, Miami. You can’t!

Bengals -1/Saints +1 – This is my BET bet of the week. No way this one misses.

Ravens -3.5/NY Football Giants +3.5 – You see they call him “Wink” Martindale like the game show host. Timely reference.

Buccaneers -3.5/Steelers +3.5 – Sure, bet against Brady versus the Steelers and big brain Mike Tomlin. I dare you.

Panthers +9/Rams -9 – Panthers fans are ready for basketball season.

Cardinals -2.5/Seahawks +2.5 – Take the fictional birds of prey to cover versus the real birds of baseball.

Bills -1.5/Chiefs +1.5 – Lesser of two evils I suppose.

Cowboys PK/Eagles PK – Phillies in the playoffs and Eagles remaining unbeaten? BET. City of of Brotherly Love (S/O Vern)

MONDAY NIGHT SPECIAL –

Broncos +3/Chargers -3 – Chargers win the battle of extemporaneous 4th down attempts and cover.

PROP BET OF THE WEEK

I love all the prop overs but especially Robert Tonyan O 23.5 yards receiving.

*This is neither advice nor well thought out

** If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, get help fuckface.