2025 March Sadness Championship
No, not Felger & Mazz, it’s Felger versus Mazz! Which of the two is the worst of the worst this year? Entirely up to you. The poll will close at 9 PM EDT.
Category Archives: Media Criticism
2025 March Sadness CHUMP-ionship Preview
Time to break out your favorite cliche!
Pick your poison… Morton’s Fork (without the option of jabbing the fork into your skull)… Between a rock and a hard place.. Iran vs Iraq… Choosing between Scylla and Charybdis (in this case more like Syphilis and Chlamydia)… Stuck between the devil and the deep blue sea… Picking the lesser of two evils… A Catch-22… Sophie’s Choice (but only if you wanted the Nazis to take both your kids)… it’s the 2025 March Sadness final showdown, it’s Felger vs Mazz!
The two behemoths of Boston Sports Radio square off so you can determine who will be crowned king of the dipshits.
Why vote for Mr. Massarotti?
Mazz loves to call athletes soft, especially when they won’t interact with the media. Now, for the second time in 12 months, Tony has turned off replies on his Twitter account. His is a racist, hypocrite, coward, lapdog. At his core Mazz is luckiest leech on Earth. He bounced around on WEEI, and even the 1510 The Zzzzone, before latching on to Felger. More than happy to give up journalism for a chance to play the addle minded Costello to Felger’s angry Abbott, Mazz has ass kissed his way to the top of the Boston radio dung heap. A meteoric career in the most miserable medium ever invented, his many on-air faux pas are dismissed by a legion of excuse makers, who – unlike you – know what’s really in Tony’s heart (hopefully arteriosclerosis).
Why vote for Mr. Felger?
Felger’s carpetbagger contrarian act has warped the minds of a generation of local sports media loving morons. We live among people who have whined and moaned throughout the greatest 20+ run in sports. A time period where we witnessed more championships than any city in the history of the world, and they didn’t enjoy them because Felger told them not to not believe what they were watching. Sure, a lot of these people are neurologically deficient, or unemployed squatting deadbeats, or were raised in broken homes by parents with missing limbs, but that is no excuse for the irreparable harm that Felger has done to them!
The Prediction:
Mazz is going to channel the joie de vivre of those guys who stole Felger’s car and steal away the crown.
As you head out to the polls, never forget that much like those fish that escaped their bowl fire in that The Far Side cartoon, no matter how YOU vote, WE are equally screwed.
Patrick is from Andover del Norte.
2025 March Sadness – The Four You Deplore
Will it be a 98.5 The Sports Hub drive time intramural finals? Or false erudition vs Cro-Magnonism? Or a combination thereof? Only your votes can give us that answer. Polls will stay open until 8:30 PM EDT.
March Sadness 2025 – The Hateable Eight Results
The Hateable Eight is now The Four You Deplore.
Region C winner: Ted Johnson. Region N winner: Mike Felger.
Region V winner: Christopher Gasper. Region T winner Tony Massarotti.
See you in the polling place come Monday. Enjoy the weekend.
2025 March Sadness – The Hateable Eight Preview
Welcome to The Hateable Eight. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. YOU must be vote cautiously.
Region C Final
2 Ted Johnson vs 5 Andy Hart
A freakish mismatch that Mary Shelley would love. Frankenstein’s monster meets CTE-gor. Both are so inconsequential that WEEI isn’t even bothering to put either of their names on “The Afternoon Show”. Dumbo Hart has been polishing up on his polls, but he can’t beat this Johnson.
Region V Final
1 Chris Gasper vs 3 Albert Breer
If you squint really hard this is a classic “Nerd” vs “Jock” showdown. Gasper thinks he’s smart because he owns a thesaurus and Bertie thinks he’s an All-American he-man because he beat an indecent exposure charge at THE Brohio State. Kid Gas knows how to pretend to be smart by using a big words when he writes, but it’s awfully strange how his vocabulary becomes very monosyllabic when not in print. And the dying print media is Gasper’s level. He quickly failed at his attempt of being a sports anchor on WCVB, and NESN recently pulled the plug on his little watched Boston Globe streaming TV venture.
When he’s not living vicariously through intercollegiate athletes at his beloved alma mater Albert Redenbacher Breer is busy battling Piping Plovers on the dunes of Duxbury. He also claims to be an NFL Insider, even though has no sources, he never ventures off his couch and has yet to break a single story. He’s great at confirming things, and telling you what he thinks, but much like his Austrian Großvater he knows nothing… NOTHING!.
All his families Nazi gold won’t be able help Albert buy a spot in the Final Four.
Region N Final
1 Gabrielle Starr vs 2 Michael Felger
The big question heading into this match up is will either candidate NOT be on vacation today? When she’s not away on an all expenses paid trip, Gabby lays claim to the title of “Red Sox reporter” for the Herald, but everyone knows that the day-to-day beat work really belongs to Mac Cerullo. The “Gabby Starr Reporter” thing is really a vanity project, funded by her father. Which is a step up from her “Girl at the Game” blog which was a just a grift for trips and game tickets funded by her simp followers. I’m actually crying just thinking about it!
Felger somehow continues to be the dominant presence in the Boston Sports Mediot landscape, polluting the airwaves on 98.5 and NBC Sports Boston. He’s working two jobs just to avoid running into Gene Lavanchy at home.
Felger’s paint by numbers contrarian act won’t be enough to eclipse Gab’s shining star.
Region T Final
3 Cerrone Battel Ackerman vs 4 Tony Massarotti
The last time Mazz came across a couple of guys like Mr. Battel Ackerman he ended up suspended for a week. Ironically, Mazz’s overt racism resulted in Battel getting the chance to sell his soul for a few weekend/holiday slots. Now Battel can cosplay as a Boston mediot, all while living comfortably down in North Carolina thanks to his bread-winning wife. There’s no way “a guy like that” is going to steal the Regional Title from Mazz. Cerrone can’t hear us right?
Patrick is from Andover del Norte.
2025 Salty Sixteen Results and Schedule Update
We have them, your 2025 Hateable Eight. Several have been here before, others in uncharted territory.
The Hateable Eight round will start Thursday, March 27th, then The Four You Deplore will battle it out Monday March 31st. Consolation Match Tuesday April 1st, and the Championship on Thursday, April 3rd.
2025 March Sadness – The Salty Sixteen
Happy Monday! Welcome to the Salty Sixteen! Tough decisions will need to be made. Polls will close at 9 PM EDT.
2025 March Sadness Round of 32 – Day Two
Some fun was had yesterday, amirite? Now the two remaining Regions, C & T compete. Polls open until 9 PM EDT.
March Sadness Round 1 Day 3 Preview
If you went to bed early last night you missed a couple of white knucklers. Scott Zolak pulled out a dramatic last second win over Rich Keefe, and Rob Bradford got Guregian’d after a day-long rock fight with Karen. Remember to vote early and often, and to check back in regularly throughout the day to follow the dramatic proceedings.
Region C
8 Mark Dondero vs 9 Jared Carrabis
Mr. Dondero is going to get the entire Bellingham Jr. High lunchroom to stuff the ballot box.
7 Dan Shaugnessy vs 10 Meg Ottolini
This should have been the Battle of the Recovery Ward. Shank is back in the tournament after almost missing last year due to emergency quadruple-bypass surgery. Jeff Howe was exempt in 2024 with a severe case of what physicians now refer to as factitious disorder imposed on self (formerly known as Munchausen syndrome). But then Ottolini had to stick her upsetting feet into the mix and pull off the wild card win over Howe. Jeff may never recover. Meg O thinks she’s hilarious, has momentum and hammer toes – that’s proving to be a winning formula.
Region V
1 Chris Gasper vs 16 Dan Greenberg
Kid Gas facilely matriculates to the subsequent echelon.
3 Albert Breer vs 14 Chris Smith
Bert once again whips it out and gives Smith a golden shower.
7 Bob Ryan vs 10 Jackie MacMullen
Jurassic World: The Journalistic Trenches. Watch as Bob “T-Rex” Ryan takes down Jackie “Metriacanthosaurus” MacMullen in a battle that time forgot! The CGI budget for Mr. Ryan’s teeth alone must have broken the bank. Good thing we have been tipped off on how to make money just for charging our phones.
Region N
1 Gabby Starr vs 16 Joe Haggerty
Pretty tricky of the committee to pit Ms. Starr up against “Pork Chop” Joe right before Shabbat. Expect Gabby to persevere.
5 Nick “Fitzy” Stevens vs 12 Chris Forsberg
The Greek carpetbagger bags another victim.
2 Michael Felger vs 15 Phil Perry
Felger doesn’t under perform until the Final Four.
Region T
6 Taylor Kyles vs 11 Kendra Middleton
The DEI Derby! Were there no Boston bred slightly chubby 6’s that the Sports Hub could have hired? The Jacksonville Jackass will put a banana in Kyles tailpipe and pull off the minor upset.
2 Mike Reiss vs 15 Trenni Casey
MAJOR UPSET ALERT! Historically these seedings should be reversed, but Trenni has become somewhat irrelevant, while Reiss has taken a dramatic heel turn in the past year. Hopefully Mrs. Casey gives Myke Crease a personal apology once she’s done beating his ass.
Patrick is from Andover del Norte.
March Sadness 2025 Day Two Part 2
Now for the second batch:
Polls remain open until 10:30 PM EDT. Have some fun out there!
The 15 