The 15

What’s really good y’all?!?!  Got here as soon as I can. Your they/them has been working tirelessly on a top secret reporting mission related to two Patriots legends (we’ll call them T and BB for now). In the meantime, life* happened.

* Death

I was at the pool nursing a hangover from a righteous “erotic gathering” the night before when I heard the news.  It is not the kind of news you want to hear, like Keely Shay Smith and Pierce splitting up. Instead, it was the worst news I have ever heard in my entire life other than The Challenger. Several days ago Vinny Scully and Bill Russell both died, possibly together. That part is unclear but I have confirmed that neither is alive. The news hit me harder than a Deshaun Watson rope.  Scull and Will, as they were commonly known, were basically the same person to me as I do not see color. At all. Like when George Floyd was getting killed I was like what are the colors of these people?

I know you don’t come to your girl Anita’s page (in droves lolololololol) to hear the stereotypical tropes about life, death and equality. Judging by my instagram followers, you come to see my turbo bod. But as a person of faith, I believe Scull and Will are together right now, floating on a cloud, skin off, confronting an Old Testament angel of judgment, atoning for their sins and laughing…

…and unlike when my mom died from working at the IRS, within six months Scull and Will will* be trotting into the gates of paradise, wondering why they can’t find Red Auerbach.

*will will lololol

Anita Thrust is the lead writer for Competent Ladies Against Mansplaining section of The15net dot com. They/she lives in the Greater Boston Area with they’s rescue doggo Yodel, and theirs cats, Alice B. Toklas and Lil Wobey. Follow her/they @anitafifteen on the Twitter machine.

Happy New Year to my North American peepies! It is with a heavy heart and an absolute dump truck ass that I must report that Jon Maddon has died at the age. Most people know the Mad Dog from his work as a radio personality, but I remember him differently.

To me, Ol’ Jon JonBoy (as he was known) was a voice unlike any other. His “POW” bellowed through the halls of my mother’s boyfriend’s apartment and my father’s basement. His trademark “FIELD GOAL” is known in cities and towns from my hometown to other places. As I blossomed, his voice continued as the soundtrack of my trek to womanhood. I lost my virginity with his voice booming in the background. I got absolutely destroyed by my then boyfriend while he was in the AFC Championship in franchise mode, which notably has not been updated significantly with features since 2006. Note: I am now pansexual, which is hilarious.

Of course, in his later years, the Mad Man he became known for his alcohols. He appeared in beer commercials and created Almaden vineyards, where he became the face of one of the world’s most widely recognized red wine grape varieties. It is grown in nearly every major wine producing country among a diverse spectrum of climates from Australia and British Columbia to Lebanon. 

While he never put out a WNBA video game or really accomplished anything at all remotely important unrelated to football, he was a fixture in the lives of many women in sports. I can’t even count the times that I have been interviewing pro athletes from all leagues nearly every single day for the last years, and all they want to talk about is their Maddon rating.

In 2022, I have pledged to work on my mental health and the Madden Ultimate Team mode that is my life. I may never have the luck of Stephanie Zimbalist, but I plan to be the cover athlete of ’22. I hope the same for all of you.

Anita Thrust is the lead writer for Competent Ladies Against Mansplaining section of The15net dot com. She lives in the Greater Boston Area with her rescue doggo Yodel, and her cats, Alice B. Toklas and Lil Wobey. Follow her @anitafifteen on the Twitter machine.

Yo my PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPS!!!!! Remy died.

It happened recently, from unknown causes. Just like everyone else who has ever lived, Remy passed away, leaving his mark on the town of Boston and each of our hearts, like a moonshot over the Giant Monster in left and Mass Ave.

As a female (her) in sports, Remy was one of the most important things in my life. I can tell you basically all his stats from every year he played with the Socks, including his unforgettable 1980 season where he hit .313 with zero homers. Everything about him was legendary, and screamed “Boston Baseball.” From his trademark voice to the way he would say “Buenos Noches” in the first period of the game to his family first mindset, there is not one person in Massachusetts who does not love every member of the Remy family with all their heart. Don’t get me started on his moustache. He was the Pierce Brosnan of the booth.

You know, when people used to care about baseball, they would talk about how it was ruined by “Pink Hats.” For those of you who do not know, a “Pink Hat” is a girl (she) who said they liked baseball, but wouldn’t know the infield fly rule or the 12 men on the field rule. Let me tell you…I may be absolutely gorgeous, but I know both of those rules. I remember bouncing on my dad’s knee listening to Remy’s call of Ortiz’s blast in game 7 of 2004. “We’ll see you later tonight!”

Well, we won’t see you any more Remdog, but in my dreams I will.

Anita Thrust is the lead writer for Competent Ladies Against Mansplaining section of The15net dot com. She lives in the Greater Boston Area with her rescue doggo Yodel, and her cats, Alice B. Toklas and Lil Wobey. Follow her @anitafifteen on the Twitter machine.

Wuss good my peoples? It’s ya gurly Anita coming back to you with a quick but important message. Now normally I just chop it up about sports. You know, touchdowns and extra innings and WNBA career leader in blocks Margo Dydek. But recently I’ve been seeing some startling stuff on the ol’ web about how some people are actually depressed. Trust me, there is nothing harder than being a woman in sports (other than getting a floater off against Margo). Between deadlines with #the15 and keeping up with my social calendar, I’m more stressed than Remington Steele at an art gallery and no getaway car.

Through my spirituality I have learned a very valuable lesson about mental health. If you are feeling depressed, like there is no end in sight to the drudging plague and torture of everyday existence, just stop feeling like that. Don’t have bad mental health!

So you may be saying “easy for you to say sporty what about my mortgage and kids?” To that I say “Mental heal(yes)th.” You’ve just got to stop being depressed you silly geese!

Let me give you an example to show this isn’t just me being a know-it-all. Last month I had 4 deadlines for #the15, my ex’s fiancee was posting thirst traps on the ‘gram (Instagram) and the Taliban surged back into power two decades after a U.S. led regime toppled its regime in Kabul, Afghanistan. Did I get all emotional and depressed? Hell to the uh uh. I sat on my couch for 2 weeks and did nothing. As Charlie Sheen would say: Victory!

For you sportsers like me, I’ll end this with an analogy you can relate to. Life is like a 4th quarter in the WNBA. You’re always up by 1. The other team has the ball. Maybe its Delilah Henderson with the ball on a string. You’re guarding her with all your might. She releases her silky smooth set shot and it goes through the rim. Do you crawl into the fetal position and die. No. It’s overtime.

Anita Thrust is the lead writer for Competent Ladies Against Mansplaining section of The15net dot com. She lives in the Greater Boston Area with her rescue doggo Yodel, and her cats, Alice B. Toklas and Lil Wobey. Follow her @anitafifteen on the Twitter machine.

Sports are like life. One minute you’re waving the ball fair in the bottom of the ninth to beat the Reds like the O.G. Carlton Fisk, and the next your ex is posting engagement party pictures with your sorority sister on the gram and your bff is liking the pic wuuuuuuuuuuuttt.

Just when I thought the Celts were going to wave the ball right around Pesky’s pole on the monster, they airball a foul throw. Nobody, not Beyonce or Meg the Stallion or Meryl Streep or Michael B. Jordan or Michael A. Jordan can tell me that this dude Ime Udoka is a better coach than Kara Lawson.

I thought Brad was going to do the right thing. I really did. Like, remember when you first heard Driver’s License by Olivia Rodrigo and you cried and ate Nutella and drove to your besties’ house to spill tea and watch Pierce Brosnan movies? Remember that emotion? That’s real. If I’m being really real here, like really, really, real, I have to say that this is another example of Boston’s reputation as a sexist town being confirmed.

Boston fans want to rant and rave about how the stereotypes are wrong, and that beantown is a bastion of inclusiveness and progressive thought. They get aggressive and defensive about it, but facts are facts. From the school bus issues in the 70’s to Carol and Charlie Stuart and so on: It’s a hard truth: Boston is a sexist city.

So where do we go from here? I mean, the Cees could draft Mississippi center Shakira Austin (like they should). The Red Sox could hire Jennie Finch as pitching coach. The Patriots could hire Sarah Fuller as kicking helper. The Bruins could hire Nancy Kerrigan as skating coach.

All examples off the top of my head. Will it happen? Well, in Olivia Rodrigo’s words:

I got my driver’s license last week
Just like we always talked about
‘Cause you were so excited for me
To finally drive up to your house

I hope Brad is listening. I hope Boston is listening.

Hey y’all! Let me start by saying this isn’t a story designed to get you to watch the WNBA; You’re already watching.

It wasn’t an easy decision to get involved with the 15.  When you are a woman in sports, you have to deal with waaaay more than any dude. It’s basically like trying to hit John Papelbon’s 98 on the red with a wiffleball bat from Osco Drug. I’ve written some things you’ve read before, but the time is right for me to take it to a much bigger stage. This is Kyrie moving on to the Big Apple. When the 15 asked me to be the lead writer for Competent Ladies Against Mansplaining, I decided to take on the challenge.

Back to the Queens of the hardwood. The WNBA is more popular than ever, with ratings for last Sunday’s Atlanta Dream tilt outdoing the boys’ Atlanta Hawks game 1 win over the Philadelphia Sixers. it doesn’t end there. As of Saturday, June 12, here were the hottest jersey sales in America.

1. Tom Brady (Don’t get me started…UGH)
2. Kobe “Bean” Bryant
3. Lebron “King” James
4. Sabrina “Buckets” Ionescu
5. Patrick “Patty no-look” Mahomes
6. Cam “Super Cam” Newton
7. Tina “Goat” Charles
8. Brianna “Goat” Stewart
9. Lamar Jackson
10. Betnijah Laney

So when you see the title the WNBA has “NEXT,” I’m talking about you, Boston.  The time is right, the stars are aligned, and a little birdie who would know has whispered that this is a real possibility. Think of the best moments in Boston sports history: Brady’s game winner to upset the Rams in Super Bowl 36, Dave Roberts’ steal in 2003 to reverse the Curse of Babe Ruth, Marchand’s hat trick in 2011 to hoist the trophy, and the 1998 all star game.

Now, think about actual meaningful basketball in Boston.  Think about what it would mean.  Local girls and boys and those who haven’t decided what they are would have female gay role models to look up to.  I grew up watching the Celtics with my dad and I remember seeing Larry’s final game. I was there at the FleetCenter. I fell in love with the sport. Since then, the Celtics have won one title and been to the finals only three times.  It’s time to try something new.  Give the ladies a chance. I think they’ve earned it.

The world is already watching the WNBA, and soon the world will be watching Boston. We got next.

Anita Thrust is the lead writer for Competent Ladies Against Mansplaining section of The15net dot com. She lives in the Greater Boston Area with her rescue doggo Yodel, and her cats, Alice B. Toklas and Lil Wobey.