Author Archives: TheIntern15

June TO’s & Threes – Celtics Column

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Meanwhile, at the Hall of Justice…

By Vinny Jace, Special to the15net dot com:

Ever since Joe Mazzulla became the Celtics head coach the importance of winning the math battle took front and center among the team’s priorities. So even as Boston shot their poorest, (10-39 from beyond the arc) they didn’t let the results or Dallas dictate their gameplan.

For two games Boston found themselves without their best player, Tatum could not go far without being smothered and often found himself unable to get open. This led to Tatum to becoming a facilitator, driving to the basket like a point guard, 18 drives in game one, 29 in game 2. Through his shooting woes, Tatum’s playmaking shines averaging 10 assist in the two Celtics victories. Defensively what Tatum has done, being tasked with guarding the opposing teams center, he played his part limiting Dallas’s ability to attack the paint through lobs.

The combination of Boston possessing so many on-ball playmakers, and Kristaps Porzingis and Al Horford forcing defenses to guard beyond the arc, drags Dallas’s bigs away from the basket and even if the help collapses on Tatum he can kick it to an open shooter in the corners.

What Boston is exploiting is the splendors of a five-out lineup, while Dallas struggles to hide their weakest link. While Luka shoots an impressive 51% from the field, averaging a strong 31 points, what he is unable to do is establish consistent ball movement into Dallas’ preferred areas on the floor. Boston just doesn’t fear the likes of P.J Washington and Derrick Jones Jr when left open above the break and they’ve given them no reason to think otherwise. Until a Maverick not named Luka or Kyrie Irving show they can make Boston pay for leaving them open, then those corner threes won’t be an option for the series.

All this and more.

While Tatum is guarding bigs and out-muscling them for hard fought rebounds, Luka is moving like there is lead in his feet. His shot is still there, the step back triple and mid-ranger is still dependable. However, for a player not exactly known for his defense, Luka has given an effort even below his expectations. Players like Daniel Gafford are supposed to cover up for Dončić, protecting the rim when the opponent blows by the latter. Yet, Dončić is unable to do that in this clip right here. All he has to do is get Tatum to go left where Gafford will be there near the rim to help, but instead he lets him go right.

Celtics have an opportunity this week to continue their road playoff winning streak Wednesday night, and then possibly to return home with no one left to beat.

Vinny Jace appears on the Entitled Weekend podcast. He does not live deep in the heart of Texas.

May TO’s & Threes – Celtics Column(s)

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By Vinny Jace, Special to the15net dot com:

Looking Back:

There was no tension. There was no hyperventilation or sphincter tightening. The series was over, and it was evident the Celtics were in a different class than their opponent. Only through lapses of judgement and execution did they allow Cleveland to land a counterpunch. When the Celtics remained focused the Cavaliers stood no chance. Despite missing Kristaps Porzingis for the sixth straight game the Celtics notched the series clincher and an impressive mark of 5 wins to 1 loss since his absence. This mostly thanks to the 37-year-old center Al Horford who was asked to shoulder a larger portion of the workload, such as in Game 5 vs Cleveland when backup Luke Kornet was not able to keep up with Evan Mobley.

He played thirty-five minutes in a game the Celtics absolutely had to have. They needed the rest. They needed the confidence builder closing out two series in quick fashion brings a team. And Cleveland played like a pesky gnat not willing to be swatted. Whenever the Celtics appeared close to finishing them off the Cavs found answers to keep things mildly interesting. It’s something past Celtics teams would have allowed to cause discouragement and to wilt down the stretch. But this year’s team appears to be made of sterner stuff.

Horford quietly does his role, setting screens, pop to the perimeter, and have the ball swing to him for the open triple or swing it to a teammate with a higher chance to make it or if he wants, drive it to the hole. That’s Al. Old Man Al. Always putting the team before himself. His quick footwork sealing off avenues to the paint on Isaac Okoro, and his ability to stick with guard Darius Garland lowered Cleveland’s ceiling as you can tell Horford had an extra skip in his step tonight. Savor it, because there is no assurance there are many of these Old School Horford games left. Lord knows we’ve seen plenty.

The elder statesman of the Celtics that’s been through battles with Tatum and Brown when they were younglings, shepherding then through playoff series with Giannis, Embiid and LeBron, until they were ready to take on the main role, but Horford was always ready and willing to dawn the cape again if the signal was flashed in the sky. His name was in the 2022 series vs Milwaukee when Giannis was running his mouth and needed to be humbled. When Bam Adebayo was causing mayhem in the 2022 conference finals Horford was there to put a lid on it. When the MVP Joel Embiid looked ready to finally vanquish his longtime nemesis, Big Al kept him a conference finals virgin.

Just a simple gaze of the box score, 8/15 from the field, six triples, 22 PTS | 15 REB | 5 AST | 1 STL | 3 BLK. This while facing allegations of being “washed” after an iffy Game 3 and 4 performances. Ladies and gentlemen, I am here to tell you he is not washed. He just has to pick his spots. And when he finds said spot the Celtics better not waste it.

Looking Forward:

I think you’ll find it’s the exact same measurements as our TDGarden back in Boston.

The last time the Celtics played Indiana, Tyrese Haliburton was averaging 23 points and 12 assists, considered a shoo-in for First Team All-NBA and captain of a historically great Pacers offense. Since his injury his averages sank to 16 points and 9 assists; his playoffs numbers sit at 18 points and 4 assists. His hamstring injury continues to persist even long after its diagnosis. Some days he’s great, some days he isn’t. 

How the Pacers survive is through others picking up the slack. Indiana potentially has the best bench unit of the remaining teams this playoffs. T.J McConnell is a perfect facilitating point guard on the second unit able to keep the teams head above water when Haliburton is on the pine. T.J is quick, shifty, and decisive. Indiana is a lot like Boston in the regard when they are running they are borderline unstoppable.

Indiana’s calling card beyond Haliburton is they have more than one bullet in the chamber and aren’t reliant on just one contributor. If Hali isn’t himself, dependable Pascal Siakam can create for himself with a lethal spin-move. Myles Turner, the veteran big from Texas, can imitate Dirk Nowitzki on some nights, other nights he’ll defend the paint like Pacer great Rik Smits utilizing his 6-11 frame and 250-pound body. 

The Celtics primarily do their damage with Tatum bullying or finessing his way near the basket. His three-point attempts last postseason was near eight-in-a-half, now sits at six-in-a-half. The change is the strength he’s put in his upper body to absorb resistance and minimize off-balance shot attempts. Tatum is in the middle of his athletic peak. This is the time for him to attack, attack and attack. In the four regular season games versus Indiana, JT averaged 33 on 70 percent true shooting. 

Vroom vroom Pacers

I expect this series to be a track meet. Indiana cannot sufficiently defend, sporting the 4th worst opponents points per game at 120.2. The Pacers best friend has been the Celtics historic worst enemy: shooting variance. In wins they shoot 53% from the field, in losses that falls to 47%. In their Game 7 dismantling of New York they shot 67 percent from the field, ungodly figure that can happen in more than one occasion if Boston does not acknowledge the smaller margin of error they have than in their previous playoff series. 

Being without Kristaps Porzingis for at least the first two games (maybe three) means they’ll be without their best rim protector and lone constant mid-range threat. This means Al Horford will have his work cut out for him again with Turner, hustling and bustling for rebounds. Second chance points will be crucial and if Boston can win in that category it’ll go along way in pushing a hot Pacers team back to earth.

The Celtics will get to their spots and have open looks, Indiana cannot defend them consistently. It is up to Boston to MAKE their looks and remain ahead. Hali waxes and wanes with the flow of the game. If Indiana is in a big enough deficit early, he’ll waive the white flag and remind us he’s hurt. If it’s competitive or Indiana has another one of those 150-point games, he’ll be stunting. I love Hali, but his post-injury self is a front runner. Knock him out early and keep him down. The main reason this series goes longer than it should is if Lady Luck smiles down on them and they average 130 per night. 

Vinny Jace appears on the Entitled Weekend podcast. He does not live at the foot of Mount Monadnock.

From The15 Vault – A Few Too Many Men – October 10, 1979

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Originally published on the BSMW Message Board July 12, 2011

(From the unsold pilot episode of SportsDad)

TITLE CARD: There are over 50,000 known douchebags in Massachusetts. The highest concentration, live in this 750 square foot apartment.

FADE IN:

EXT. BOSTON – DAY

We fly over the Boston Garden, heading toward the Charles River, before making a sharp right to the Northeast. Charlestown.

CUT TO:

INT. CHARLESTOWN APARTMENT – DAY

We see a young boy laying face down on a couch. The door to the apartment opens and BILL SIMMONS JR, 9, lifts his head. His nose is bloodied, the couch stained. He rises and attempts to hide the evidence with a pillow. WILLIAM SIMMONS SR 38, enters the living room carrying three lunch pails. He’s a ghastly sheepdog of a man.

BILL SR
What have you been doing in here?

BILL JR
I…too many men…in

He stifles a cry.

BILL SR
In what? Your pants? Too many men in your pants!?

BILL JR
On! On the ice! Too many men on the ice!

BILL SR
They broke our hearts?

<beat>

BILL SR and BILL JR (together)
AGAIN!

Bill Sr reaches over and ruffles his son’s hair.

BILL SR
Cheer up son, that Bird fellow is going to start playing for the Celtics in the fall and I’ve got a feeling he’s going to be something special.

BILL JR
Why’s that dad?

BILL SR
He’s gritty. Hard-nosed. Hard working. Like us.

Bill Jr thinks for a second and starts to nod his head.

BILL JR
Like us.

<beat>

Hey dad?

BILL SR
Yes?

BILL JR
Can I go over to Patrick Beverly’s to play? *

FREEZE FRAME

ROLL OPENING CREDITS

April TO’s and Three’s – Celtics Column

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By Vinny Jace, Special to the15net dot com:

(written prior to Game One)

There are two kinds of superstar players in the NBA, those who can get it down in crunch time and those who can get you to their critical moments but needs someone else to finish the job.

For every Jordan, LeBron, Bird, there’s a Ewing, Drexler, and Paul George. You can win divisions, playoff series, maybe even sneak into the finals once or twice, but you’ll never win the title for what ever their shortcoming be.

Thus lay the greater mystery of this sport: what does it take to cross that threshold? Previous test cases like LeBron suggest it is mostly mental, the growth and maturity that comes from failure. Deep down we knew LeBron was always capable of winning the big one. The sensationalist drivel expounded by reporters and fans added theatrics to a rather anti-climactic finale. 

The real “we didn’t think he could do it until he did” example is Dirk Nowitzki. Outmuscled in the 2006 NBA Finals. Mentally deconstructed in the 2007 1st round series vs Golden State. Nowitzki was labeled soft, a poor defender, and someone who wilted under the pressure. From 2008 to 2011 he continued to play at a high level, even though the interest for him waned. The story was written and ready for publishing; another superstar with all the potential unable to take that final step. 

The Germans probably have a word for what Dirk Nowitzki accomplished.

Until the faithful day he rewrote said story. Now the lasting imagine of Nowitzki is not him kicking the ball into the stands as his team implodes to an inferior Miami team. It’s him so overcome with emotion as the seconds trickle down in the Miami arena, LeBron and Wade standing forlorn, the impossible victor retreating from the spotlight to shed a tear in solitude. 

But for every Dirk, there’s players similar to him who are the nail to the superior player’s hammer. Drexler couldn’t beat MJ. Ewing couldn’t beat Olajuwon. Paul George couldn’t overcome himself. 

Can Jayson Tatum overcome the Miami Heat? He did it once before. An underrated gem is his Game 7 in Miami in the 2022 East Finals series. Jimmy Butler being the lone Heat with a pulse for 40 of the first 48 minutes keeping their chances alive, Tatum quietly notched an efficient 26 point effort, including a sick turnaround on Butler before a last ditch comeback by Miami fell so short. It was the most clutch Tatum’s ever been. On the road, all the momentum on the opposing side, and the Celtics led wire-to-wire.

Yet, they almost blew it. The ball continuously found their weakest link (Sorry, Marcus) and the Celtics ran the basketball equivalent of victory formation for the final 3 minutes and 20 seconds. Five of the final six Celtics shots came from Smart, not because of his selfishness, but because of Tatum’s fecklessness. Not wanting to step on anyone else’s toes, not wanting to be the guy everyone looked at for why things went wrong. 

There is no malice in Tatum’s heart when he does this. I sense fear and it extends like the plague to the others. Basketball is a game most akin to spreading a diseases and cures. A good bench is a symptom of an established hierarchy setting the backups to carry the load for the needed respite for the starters. That’s the cure. The disease is if your superstar falters it’s unlikely anyone will save the team. 

The numbers regarding the Celtics in the clutch aren’t initially concerning. Teams tend to slow the pace down and milk the clock when they’re up by a substantial amount. For Boston, the victory cigar is lit up either prematurely or their drop in effort leads to a heart stopping comeback attempt from the opponent. 

Over the years the Celtics have fielded different teams, capable and incapable of certain things. The numbers don’t reflect in a vacuum how they responded to gut check situations, but the situations they often found themselves in. 

The Isaiah Thomas-era Celtics have better numbers in clutch situations than the Tatum-era Celtics, but they rarely ran away with contests and often found themselves going 100% against teams either in their tier of “plucky, but not real contenders” or below. For the past three years the Celtics have found themselves considered top of the heap and they meet that criteria by smashing lesser teams into oblivion. 

So does Boston rank at the bottom of pace in the clutch because opposing defenses up the tension forcing their best players into compromising positions, off balanced shots leading to fast break opportunities? Or is it because they’re bored and we shouldn’t overly react to a game serving little relevance to the standings. 

As a first-round matchup with Miami looms it seems we’ll learn soon enough. 

Vinny Jace appears on the Entitled Weekend podcast. He does not live on an island in the Quabbin Reservoir.

Sour Sixteen 2024 Preview:

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Sent to us from Patrick in Andover del Norte:

Welcome to unHoly week! The Sour Sixteen, then The Hateable Eight, followed by Easter with the in-laws. I’m more excited than when I got that an 8-day late St. Patrick’s Day card.

Region C – Mike Felger (1) vs Shukri Wrights (NR) It’s a matchup of two carpetbaggers just trying to make it big in good old Beantown. We have the wild card, native New Yorker, and current Philadelphia resident, Shukri Wrights doing battle with the titan of New England sports media, Wisconsin’s own Michael Felger. It’s David vs Goliath, if Goliath was a cuckold germaphobe with granny glasses, and David was a walking malapropism cosplaying as a Bruins fan. Do your Bleav in Ramadan miracles? Me neither.

Chris Gasper (2) vs Rich Keefe (14) There’s no buzz about this matchup. Keefe has benefited from some weak competition in the first couple of rounds. Gasper has been quietly going about his business. He must be saving it for the regional final. Kid Gas low efforts his way through again.

Region V – Tom E Curran (1) vs Adam Jones (12) Jones has been getting more votes than he has listeners. It’s been a good run for the self-proclaimed “Sports Vulva”, but it ends here. Curran is the Carrot Top of the local hot takerz. He’s undoubtedly successful. He probably made you laugh once or twice 20 years ago, but now he’s just hanging on with the same old shtick and no one is quite sure how, or why. Tater Top moves on.

Dan Shaughnessy (6) vs Dan Lifshatz (2) It’s a Dan-off! If his latest column proves anything, it’s that Shank’s heart condition must be terminal. People will do/say/write the craziest things when they’re trying to avoid eternal damnation. I hope his Calling Hours don’t conflict with the Red Sox opener. In other Dan news, this weekend Lifshatz came out as anti-Caitlin Clark. He doesn’t “like the way she plays the game”. Too much flopping. I guarantee that no one ever saw Lifshatz flopping around on the University of Hartford’s tennis courts. Because he plays the game the right way? NO! Because he’s lying about playing Division 1 tennis! Lying Dan Lifshatz easily defeats the corpse of Dan Shaughnessy.

Region N – Mike Kadlick (16) vs Gabby Starr (13) Cinderfella vs Cinderella. Mike Kadlick recently gave a scouting report of Drake Maye. Since Kadlick “played” quarterback in college, you’d think maybe he’d make a salient observation. You would be wrong. Kadlick mentioned how Maye has a great arm and can throw to all three levels of the field. Kadlick then listed these levels as “left, right, and (long pause) center”. This is the kind of insight you get from a Division 3 scrub QB with a 47% completion percentage. Gabby Starr thankfully has not opined on the QB class of 2024. She’s been too busy basking in the afterglow of her brave pro-Tim Wakefield/anti-Curt Schilling article from last week. Say what you will about old Gabs, but she is willing to stick her nose in other people’s business. Hope may spring eternal, but I think Kadlick’s storybook run continues. (I’m literally crying while typing this.)

Mike Giardi (6) vs Jim Murray (2) A battle between two of the most thin-skinned Twitter tough guys in New England. If you haven’t been blocked by either of them, then you haven’t pushed back on one of their crappy opinions. Giardi is odious, but he is an irrelevant has been. Fired from the NFL Network, unwanted and unloved, with no employment opportunities, he finds himself clinging on to Greg Bedard as the remnants of his career quickly circle the drain. Jim Murray, and his deformed skull, are much more deserving off your scorn and your vote.

Region T – Tony Massarotti (1) vs Mark Daniels (5) UPSET ALERT! No one has been campaigning harder for votes in this tournament than Mark Daniels. Mortimer Snerd to Jonathan Kraft’s Edgar Bergen, Daniels has been mouthing the company line of the new look Patriots all across the Twitter-verse. Mazz is annoying, but he’s like stepping in dog shit annoying. Usually easily avoidable, but when he does get you, you’ve only got yourself to blame for walking into it. With the Red Sox irrelevant, and the Patriots in at least a two-year media gifted rebuilding grace period, don’t be surprised if the Beasley Media Group cost-cutters start taking a closer look at Mr. Massarotti.

Albert Breer (3) vs Andrew Callahan (2) There seem to be three kinds of people in sports media this millennia. The few who have beaten the odds and have an audience, the vast majority who are struggling for relevance, and the extremely lucky one’s who are trust fund kids who are “working” just to get out of the house. The later group can brush aside the lack of pay, because to them the exposure is the true reward. Something for mater and pater to brag about at the country club. Breer is the epitome of that group. He’s never had an interesting opinion or broken a story. Anything he writes or says is just the most banal of observations cloaked in faux insider double talk. He’s never had to worry about working for a living so he could afford to take no paying jobs and parlay them into airtime. He may be the most successful no talent in sports media. Andrew Callahan is a slug. He and the rest of his “media good guy” joy boys are in for a rude awakening. Callahan’s starts a little earlier than the others, as Breer breezes into the Hateable Eight.

Patrick is from Andover del Norte.

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