The 15

Sure, Roman Anthony hit a 497-foot grand slam but remember the ball travers further at Worcester’s lofty altitude.

Welcome back to Boston Marco Sturm.

Dort? what is that? Dutch?

How is a home game her “day off”? She’s in sports! Maybe change the blog to ‘Girl NOT at the Game?’

Kendrick Perkins seems to be aging in Zolaks.

Just found out I’m banned from all NH DK casinos because I win too much.

Pablo Torre’s like a ladyboy version of Katie Nolan.

I could listen to Nancy Lieberman talk basketball all day long. Such a brilliant mind.

Swiss Team frugal with goals allowed, defeats USMNT 4-0.

Cakes are cooking for Jackie Stewart, Joey Dee, Adrienne Barbeau, Skip Alan, Frank Beard, George Willig, Donnie Van Zant, Johnny Neel, Joe Montana, Hugh Laurie, Memhet Oz, Rob Birch, Tiffany Cohen, Peter Dinklage, Brock Marion, Geoff Ogilvy, Joshua Jackson, Diana Taurasi, José Reyes, Shia LaBoeuf, Brock Holt, , Maya Moore, Anna Sawai,and Jessica Fox.

I did some math i eat 3,000-3,500 calories per day. Never figured this out before, just eat every few hours.

The Ringer should rebrand themselves as ‘The Last Thing I Saw’.

Seth cashed in on Jey, Sami wins KoTR and Sami beats Seth at SummerSlam.

Finding a woman attractive is basically rape.

News Item: Patriots head coach Mike Vrabel and private aviation provider Magellan Jets have announced a partnership the company announced today in a press release.

Chappell Roan looks like she always has skid marks.

I almost feel hungover when I wake up the morning after a bad Red Sox loss, completely sober. My brain can’t even process a thought yet, but my body still feels the residual effects of the loss from the previous night, all before I can recall that they even lost.

Hearing whispers that DiJonai “Black Poupon” Carrington is a dirty basketball player who hates White women.

Tough day for the Commonwealth.

Hey gang of congenital fibbers! This week’s Phrase that Pays is, “That’s as accommodating as I can be to someone who just called me a pig.”

I love how the terrible drunk at the corner of the bar turns into a horse racing expert 3 times a year. It’s refreshing.

Red Line Reminder: June 14 – 15 (this weekend) Shuttle Buses replace service between JFK/UMass and Braintree for signal upgrades. Commuter Rail will be fare-free between South Station & Braintree.

Can’t believe Elon and Trump broke up during Pride Month.

Fitzy always looks like he’s about to say “Check please!” in an absurdly hammy manner.

Well, they’ve got a new dance and it goes like this
(Bop shoo-op, a-bop-bop, shoo-op)
Yeah, the name of the dance is Peppermint Twist
(Bop shoo-op, a-bop-bop, shoo-op)
Well, you like it like this, the Peppermint Twist
(Bop shoo-op, a-bop-bop, shoo-op)

It goes round and round, up and down
Round and round, up and down
Round and round and a-up and down
And a one, two, three, kick, one, two, three, jump.

The #1 complaint these psycho fans have about Bruins management is that they prioritized playoffs over championships to maximize revenue, which is the dumbest take. The way you maximize revenue, especially beyond gate receipts, is by winning the Cup. If their goal was to have the Garden open more nights, they wouldn’t have mortgaged the future multiple times. They would welcome a wild card berth and hope to make the second round. They would’ve added to the roster this year to back into 8th place. They wouldn’t have fired Cassidy or Montgomery. They’re doing the opposite of everything these losers are blaming them for.

If you’re confusing Sikhs with Muslims, you’re a moron.

I hope Boston has a parade for Marchand if he wins the Cup.

30-26? Does that Barstool Basketball league not use a shot clock? Congratulations?

You very much are allowed to shout ‘Fire’ in a crowded movie house. And what’s more, the same goes for shouting ‘Movie!’ in a crowded firehouse.

Be more pill-addled.

Say hello to the last adult male in America without a calf tattoo.

Honk if you remember the McDonald’s Snack Wrap.

Tyrese Haliburton is making all these shots because Steve Kerr didn’t play him.

Where’s Bill James?

This one really hurts me to say more than any of the tweets in this series ever have: Dairy Queen – not as good anymore.

Belated congratulations to that US Hockey Team that did the thing.

Anthony Anthony? Really?

Jaylen Brown today underwent a successful right knee arthroscopic debridement procedure. He is expected to participate in training camp without limitation.

Best bet for the weekend: an eventful 250th birthday to the Army.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. I heard you missed us. We’re back.