The 15

Jerod Mayo won his first game as HC. Just sayin’.

Stupid me thought Kawhi’s LA Clippers contract was the no show job! <Rodney Dangerfield.gif>

Just catch the 95 MPH fastball you weren’t expecting. What’s the big deal? But you know who else wasn’t expecting a fast one down the middle? That’s right: John O’Keefe.

Dondy is gonna own the 2030’s

No mass shooting at UMass Lowell last week means the Shedd Park incident still the worst catastrophe in Lowell history.

“Jump Around”(1992) is not a great walkout choice for Super Bowl champs on opening night.

Pam Oliver is morphing into Harriet Tubman.

Brazil can be a dangerous country. A friend of mine lives there.

The subtext of The Departed is that Nicholson’s character is an impotent homosexual who grooms young, impressionable men into a life of crime. So yeah, I’m fucking JACKED UP for football season!

A tale of two rookie pitchers by facial hair… Payton Tolle: gets a 5 o’clock shadow at 3 p.m. Connelly Early: shaves once a month whether he needs it or not.

Get ready for the ‘Words and Phrases People Associate With Bill Belichick in Context’ website to bring the heat!

Cakes are cooking for Artie Tripp, Danny Hutton, José Feliciano, Larry Nelson, Judy Geeson, Barriemore Barlow, Bill O’Reilly, Don Muraco, Don Powell, Joe Perry, Gary Danielson, Amy Irving, Pat Mastelotto, Johnny Hickman, Carol Decker, Kate Burton, Siobhan Fahey, Chris Columbus, Colin Firth, Randy Johnson, John E. Sununu, Joe Nieuwendyk, Robin Goodridge, Big Daddy Kane, Guy Ritchie, Julie Halard-Decugis, Paula Kelley, Ben Wallace, Ryan Phillippe, Timothy Goebel, Misty Copeland, Joey Votto, Coco Rocha, Jordan Staal, and Brooke Henderson.

Rob Bradford was a Make-A-Wish kid who never died.

How are you, a grown ass 40+ year old adult, not using the correct form of “you’re” in a company wide email you sent to the owner of the company? You ARE…not ‘your’…what’re we doing here? This is like Day 1 school stuff.

Collinsworth looks like he got his makeup done at the funeral home.

Winthrop Ferry Notice: Service will bypass Seaport through the end of service today, Sept 10, due to construction for the Red Bull Cliff Diving World Series. Passengers can use the 712/713 bus between Orient Heights and Winthrop for alternate service.

Trying to find a 5’5” Asian male in Lowell? Good luck!

Maxx Crosby looks like a guy from one of Sons of Anarchy’s affiliate clubs in Oregon that gets introduced and killed in the same episode.

Twitter is now just literal Nazis and then guys who argue about Tom Brady, for some reason.

I’m worried about the Red Sox.

Hey gang, this week’s Phrase that Pays is, “I miss taking walks in the woods with you and my wiener.”

I’d like to see a throwback NFL game where they install a dirt baseball infield.

Too bad the Celtics didn’t pay Jrue and Porzingis with tree money.

To call a game because of a thunderstorm is ridiculous. The Eagles played the Cardinals in a blizzard in 1948. I was there. – Upton Bell.

Is 38 Studios moving to the Seaport too?

You can’t put a number on how many kids I want to see catch measles in Florida.

Hockey things are happening. Rookie Camp is underway!

50% of my enjoyment from watching the Messi Barca teams was thanks to Ray’s commentary of the matches. Ray made me a fan and judging by the comments here… that was true of so many others. Congrats on a magesteeeeeeerial run.

Micah Parsons chasing down Jared Goff legit looked like a video you’d see on Animal Planet.

Ohio State beat Grambling like they whistled at a white woman. What?

Haha.. it said a New England Journal of Medicine study. So, its actually easier to sauce and get jacked than to be a natty daddy and just do the work.

Watching the game over this morning: I’m infuriated by the way TreVeyon Henderson was used in this game.

Early wins > Early Wynn * (* Adjusted for recency bias)

So the Billy Joel song, ‘Scenes From an Italian Restaurant’, is that restaurant Mr. Cacciatore’s, down on Sullivan Street
across from the medical center?

My gen alpha niece just asked me if I’ve seen the movie “KPop Demon Hunters.”

Will Campbell with a compression sock on his left ankle. Looked fine.

Is Jeff Howe selling Never Forget 9/3/25 merch for charity yet?

Jeremiah was a bull frog
Was a good friend of mine
I never understood a single word he said
But I helped him drink his wine
And he always had some mighty fine wine.

Singin’
Joy to the world
All the boys and girls, now
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me.

Alls I’m saying is Bill Belchick wasn’t this petty a person until he was a media member for like, five months.

Honk if you remember Subway Flatizzas.

I worry less about the shoulder with Boutte then the clavicle.

News Item: Arthur Demoulas removed as Market Basket president, CEO. Time is a flat circle of sawdust.

If I’m going to take any health advice from an ex-junkie, It’s going to be Keith Richards.

Imagine having the audacity to criticize professional athletes for being too proud of a championship.

Patriots HC Mike Vrabel: DC Terrell Williams will be away for the next few days. Unrelated to the incident from March. Something that just came up. Plan is to run some tests.

Jeffrey Simmons always seems so under control and level headed.

Best bet for the weekend: Coach Drip in Miami needing a win to save his job.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Joe Giza, Old Friend Larry Legend, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. Roll us both down a mountain and I’m sure the fat man would win.