05/12/22 Cleaning Out the Sports Junk Drawer

Don’t cry, Beantown losers. You’re still winners by association.

Well that game turned from a laugher into a real kick to the yarbles, didn’t it?

Gonna need the Garden crowd to will the Bruins to a victory.

Jeff Howe should let people know he beat cancer.

Getting real 1966 season vibes from this Red Sox squad.

NFL SZN Schedule leak SZN.

I missed having Gabby Williams in the W so damn much.

If the Mets have a NESN equivalent, and they do, expect the, Cinco de Mayo Milagro to be in heavy rotation.

Cakes are cooking for Lou Whittaker, Ving Rhames, Thomas Dooley, Cara Coughenour, Tony Hawk, Jim Furyk, and Samantha Mathis.

Bob Lanier was a true gentleman. A nicer man than he was a player — and he was a hell of a player.

Terrible called strike three. A McDonald’s kiosk wouldn’t have missed that.

The #Bills are hiring #Texans assistant director of player personnel Matt Bazirgan for the role of Senior Personnel Executive in Brandon Beane’s front office. Some expertise and experience after the loss of Joe Schoen to the #Giants.

Hey gang, this week’s Phrase that Pays is “A day late and a dollar short.”

My doggy is awfully sweet, but sometimes I would like to be able to put on my shoes without a dog standing 8 inches in front of me saying “Let’s go let’s go let’s go. What’s taking you so long?”

Blue Line Update: Shuttle buses will continue to replace train service between Airport & Government Center through Tuesday, May 17. Special ferry service continues between Lewis Mall (near Maverick) and Long Wharf North (near Aquarium)

Man, that Barstool thing that happened, with those Barstool people; crazy, isn’t it?

Congratulations on your very first Calder Cup playoff game win, Springfield Thunderbirds.

All we ask is that NBA officials treat Giannis the way NFL officials did Gronk during his Patriots tenure.

Bob DeFelice has retired after 54 seasons and 1,868 games as Bentley’s head coach. He has been the only head coach since the inception of the baseball program in 1969.

Pro Tip: The wedding reception you are going to that is being held on a farm in a ‘historic barn’ means no air conditioning.

American Honda Motor Co., Inc. (Honda) is recalling certain 2020 model year Accord Hybrid, 2020 model year CR-V Hybrid, and 2020-2021 model year Insight vehicles. The DC-DC converter on certain power converter units (PCUs) contain transistors with a high concentration of dopant injections. The increased doping, along with cold ambient temperatures, could amplify the voltage output and shut down the DC-DC converter due to overvoltage, which prevents the 12-volt battery from recharging.

“I’m going to go out tonight and pay for a Strange box” does not mean what it sounds like.

Always said you were a youth quaker, Edie
A stormy little world shaker
Warhol’s darling queen, Edie
An angel with a broken wing

The dogs lay at your feet, Edie
Oh, we caressed your cheek
Oh, stars wrapped in your hair
A life without a care
But you’re not there.

Van Gundy is already shocked about that Game 6 foul call on Giannis!

Forget Apple TV, Red Sox games should be on CNN+!

Grilled bison? #SignMeUp

Sad to see Brady have to settle for a media job after getting his ownership plans ruined by Bill and his missent text message.

Honk if you remember TCR -Total Control Racing.

Never make fun of someone for mispronouncing a word. That just means they read it somewhere first. Instead, make fun of them for being a book-reading nerd.

Is Ja Morant the new Ewing Theory exemplar?

Can’t wait for the scene in Season 9 of Winning Time when Magic learns he contracted HIV from a toilet seat and the Curb Your Enthusiasm theme music plays.

For his next book, I hope Bob Ryan writes a speculative fiction one about what the NBA scores would be if the 3-point shot gimmick had never been introduced.

Aloha means goodbye. Aloha, Stihdsy.

What’s your guilty pleasure? Mine is room temperature lemon-lime seltzer!

Best bet for the weekend: important Game Sevens.

What could have been. Sorry that Hatrack McBouncepass conned everyone into thinking he was still competent and stole your job.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Bill James, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. Fire woman, you’re to blame.

Alex Kraemer did nothing wrong! Bruins could benefit by her presence in Carolina. What?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s