10/27/22 Cleaning Out the Sports Junk Drawer

A Halloween pumpkin patch at night under a full moon with vampire bats in the night sky.

Everyone NE fan at the Monday Night Football must have felt like they wasted a night waiting for The Great Pumpkin instead of trick-or-treating.

Bruins have been skating their winning lane and aren’t yet at full strength.

Brian Cashman fears no reprisals!

Really, really need a home win this weekend UMass Football.

At least the Celtics can still go 81-1.

I’m hearing that Red Sox assistant GM Eddie Romero visited Rafael Devers in the Dominican Republic on his birthday so he could personally count the number of candles on the cake.

Cakes are cooking for John Cleese, Lee Greenwood, Patty Sheehan, Rick Carlisle, John Kasay, Vernon Lewis, Kristi Richards, Brady Quinn, and Lonzo Ball.

The Astros pitching staff has cornered the market on shitty hairstyles.

All Rockport Line Commuter Rail trains will terminate and originate at Salem until further notice due to a signal issue. The Beverly to Rockport shuttle bus will accommodate passengers to and from Salem station.

Keep the silver game pants, Pats. Lose the Bad Idea jeans, Bill.

Bert Breer tweeting about Jalen Hurts in an Astros hat is Peak Bert Breer. Well, it was until his follow-up tweet, I guess. Still stand by my point, though.

People are acting surprised that Eric Hosmer is blocking Padres fans on Twitter. To be honest I’m surprised more athletes don’t do it. Former Boston Bruins defenseman Dougie Hamilton blocked me and I didn’t even know he was on Twitter. Not sure what I did, but Dougie’s loss.

Kyle Lowry is fat enough to work for 98.5. JK, fatness aside, he is otherwise ineligible to work for the Sports Hub.

Ted Johnson has white knights? Huh.

So wait, I’m supposed to get different candy in case trick or treaters come by who claim to have peanut allergies? Nut allergies are made up, like, ‘fibromyalgia’, or ‘long COVID’, or ‘thyroid cancer.’

When the Patriots aren’t playing on Sunday, and the Bruins and Celtics both have the day off as well, Red Zone Channel is an extra great treat.

Children born in 1989, the year “Seinfeld” premiered, are now the same age as George Costanza on that show.

Ava Raine has that Alexa Ray Joel ‘looks like her dad’ thing going on. Unfortunately.

Hey gang of sensibly proportioned people, this week’s Phrase that Pays is, “So there are illegal midgets out there?”

Does anybody know how the story really goes
Or do we all just hum along
Sell your soul and sign an autograph

Big bang baby, it’s a crash, crash, crash
I wanna die, but I gotta laugh
Orange crush mama is a laugh, laugh, laugh
Spin me up, spin me, spin me out.

Apparently the cure for cancer is VIP tix to the Patriots and a Kraft, Bon Jovi meet and greet. Moonshot! Thank you Joe Biden!

James Gunn about to pump out some more HITS, we’re eating good!

Following an offseason in which they were severely limited in terms of cap flexibility and without a first-round pick, the Bears are now set to enter the 2023 offseason with picks to draft with and by far the most cap space in the NFL ($100M+). Plenty of resources to work with.

Love how they say its the mile high club. But it’s really 6 miles and change lol do your math. Regardless…. It’s awesome.

I was watching the Phillies/Astros 1980 NLCS game. Luzinski was a big Polack.

Pasta’s Good Kid-ness is enduring.

“I feel great”, I think those were Oscar Wilde’s last words.

The site could use a dedicated coffee mug salesman.

There are 29% more games in which a player scores exactly 1 run than games with 1 RBI. But 2 Runs Scored and 2 RBI are almost perfectly even, and there are 8 times as many games in which a batter drives in 4 runs than games in which he scores 4. 5 runs/RBI, 70 times as many.

Danielle Murr was back in radio?

You’re never out of the game if Stephen Curry is on your team.

I thought TIE Fighters couldn’t operate in planetary atmosphere. Is this something from the computer games that is no longer considered canon, or am I just misremembering?

Honk if you remember Banana Milk Duds.

So glad David Ortiz didn’t do what Tom Brady is doing. As sad as his retirement was, he went out on top.

Zappe gets the Glengarry Playbook.

Who knew Antonio Brown was a scorpion? Besides everybody.

Is Bet with Dicey worth a look every week? It is if you like winning money! BET!

Grant Williams is innocent!!

TMZ gave Jerry Lee Lewis the ol’ Pat Burns dead/not dead treatment?

World Series’ that involve teams that switched Leagues just hit different.

Watching the video of Harper’s homer back and … wow, that camera guy on the field while he rounds the bases is really intrusive. May be just me, maybe got great shots, but that’s history and injecting the cameras into it feels off to me.

Weird that there was no mention of Ben Volin in Chad Finn’s Boston Sunday Baseball Paper media column.

Congratulations to Elon on purchasing Twitter low after the company’s stock price tanked.

Best bet for the weekend: cocky Jets fans.

It’s Going to be Scary, Kevin.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sourcesBill James, plus the members of #the15 were used in this column. What would you do? What would you do if I followed you? What would you do? I follow.

Sorry for the delay. (shrug) Happy PreFriday.

BdlG showing a scary amount of leg.

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