07/27/22 Cleaning Out the Sports Junk Drawer

Wait, what?

Red Sox lost to Toronto by a Peter King football score prediction!

What happens first? LeBron James retires or Avengers: Secret Wars (scheduled for November 7, 2025)?

Looking at Big Papi’s Cooperstown plaque: Was his Arias removed along with his gallbladder after the shooting?

Mac. He’s gonna own. You’ll see.

Don’t be such a tulip, Jaylen.

Tim Kurkjian? Not really in the Baseball Hall of Fame. Sorrey!

Doesn’t seem like Tom Brady’s Buccaneers had to break the bank to sign Julio Jones.

Wear longer shorts.

Congrats to Evan Lazar for his four years working at a fake company. Must be nice. I wouldn’t know anything about that kind of thing.

Cakes are cooking for Peggy Fleming, Yahoo Serous, Bill Engvall, Ed Orgeron, Juliana Hatfield, Triple H, and Jill Arrigton.

Don’t forget, these guys are human.

A couple days ago my phone’s autocorrect changed something common into “Peabs.” Less than ideal, or perhaps #Owning.

Orange Line Update: Regularly scheduled service has resumed. For reals.

Hey gangers, this week’s Phrase that Pays is” ” Supreme Jort Hobbyist.”

Yes, America’s Favorite Gameday Operations team plays ‘Sweet Caroline’ regardless of the score.

We’ve just learned about the passing of Jim Rebhorn in 2014. RIP.

In Victorian slang, MUFFIN-WALLOPERS were old women who would meet up to gossip over tea and cakes.

You borrow a man’s boat, you tank up to replace the fuel you used. What are we doing here?

Come and be with me
Live my twisted dream
Pro devoted pledge
Time for primal concrete sledge

The man of a thousand retirements
Will always be the one to tell you when to quit
I won’t take stock in a withered man
I’m reaching into you, I’ll make you understand

One of the worst parts of going through a breakup is having to go into your phone and delete all of the photos & videos of you and your former partner.

Tony Dow getting the Pat Burns/Tanya Roberts treatment. Sad.

If Fantasy Football is AIDS, then Madden Scores are Monkeypox.

Listen. Here’s the thing; if you can’t spot the Waingro in the first half hour you’re at the meet-up planning the heist, then you are the Waingro.

Honk if you remember the Choco Taco.

Who tracks their precipitation measurements to the hundredth of an inch? Psychopaths, that’s who.

Q:  What do Terry Pendleton, George Bell, Zoilo Versalles and Thurman Munson have in common? A.  None of them has anything remotely like Hall of Fame credentials.

Free Britney (forgot her last name)

Fun Fact: The Rolling Stones released their album ‘Voodoo Lounge’ 28 years ago on July 11, 1994!

Bill Belichick said more nice things about Raekwon McMillan today than he said about Tom Brady in 20 years.

My pet coelacanth Died, and it got stuck in the toilet, Kevin.

The Tampa Bay Heardahims, everybody!

Best bet for the weekend: Upton Bell remaining alive.

James Robert Rebhorn (September 1, 1948 – March 21, 2014)

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sourcesBill James, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. Management reserves the right to include additional items to this column, if needed.

And a happy birthday to country gothic chanteuse Bobbie Gentry.

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