07/07/22 Cleaning Out the Sports Junk Drawer

Best of luck to Americans Danielle Collins and Desirae Krawczyk in the Women’s Double Semifinals at Wimbledon.

THE15 wish THEIS the best in his new city.

Have shakier camerawork, guy recording Chris Sale’s WooSox dugout hallway tantrum.

Hate to see the Celtics lose Juwan Morgan. I was hoping to see him grow his game and wear the appropriate colors on the Celtics bench next season.

The Phoenix Mercury are NOT having a good season…

The15 has deleted a tweet about Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. The video was deleted because it did not meet editorial standards.

I’m hearing whispers the only thing holding up a trade bringing Durant to Boston is Brooklyn’s insistence on including Smart with Jaylen Brown and not Derrick White.

Hey Elle Duncan, now do #DWIdad

Free Bethany Grimer.

Dan Pastorini had more physical talent than anyone.

Cakes are cooking for Ringo Starr, Jessica Hahn, Jim Gaffigan, Cree Summer, Joe Sakic, Lisa Leslie, Carl Breeze, and Michelle Kwan.

Hansel Robles. So designated for assignment right now.

The next move will be the big one.

Revs with 25 points, same as Cincinnati and Orlando.

S*x is huge in a relationship. Don’t let that passion go away.

Great opportunity for RE/MAX to run some ‘Baker Mayfield is moving’ commercials. Tough break, Progressive.

Pretend to like lacrosse more.

‘Sportatorium’ is a terrific portmanteau. Stick tap.

Wrigley Field: weed-covered outfield wall. Fenway Park: Visionary Linda’s Rooftop Gardens. Advantage: Boston.

Shukri Wrights is gonna Brandt/Leland himself into apparently having a job in Boston radio.

Green Line Update: C and D Branch eastbound service is continuing to terminate at Kenmore. Riders can transfer there to a B Branch train for service towards North Station.

If there’s one thing Tom Brady hates besides strawberries, it’s being in the media spotlight.

The worst teams often have the best Summer League squads…

I’m proud to live in a country where a hot dog eating contest can upset a vapid, insufferable sportswriter. Congratulations, Joey Chestnut! Go fuck yourself, Peter King!

Hey gang, this week’s Phrase that pays is, “Would love to some offer sheets this year.”

Day after 4th of July poop is amazing. Leave me alone.

Jake DeBrusk has rescinded his trade request. However, our Old Friend Lefty’s request for his trade still stands.

2004 Patriots Front Seven > Patriot Front

With you I never wonder
Will you be there for me?
With you I never wonder
You’re the right one for me.

Straight people taking up valuable and limited seats in Ptown bars is not OK.

Honda will voluntarily recall approximately 737,000 model-year 2018-2020 Accord and Accord Hybrid vehicles along with 2019-2020 Insight vehicles in the United States to update software in the Body Control Module (BCM). Due to a programming flaw, a certain combination of driver actions and vehicle conditions may disrupt communication between the BCM and other components, causing illumination of several warning lights and malfunction of one or more electronic components including the rear view camera display, turn signals and windshield wipers, some potentially increasing the risk of a crash. This condition may also result in noncompliance with certain federal motor vehicle safety standards. Honda has received no reports of crashes or injuries related to this issue.

Honk if you remember Suddenly Salad.

BROGDON

Chris Curtis’ extra skin weighs more than post-Covid Lucille Burdge.

The Browns play at the Panthers in Week 1.

Late afternoon naps are absolute GOLD! Seriously I needed that nap so much and glad I was able to take one, feeling refreshed!

If you walk from Copley Square down to the Boston Common into Government Center you’ve essentially followed a Duck Boat Tour route…

Bill James; not from Topeka. At all.

Congratulations to true American Joey Chestnut. Not to be confused with Joey Chestshitter.

‘Who said Mac Jones?’ – Bills Mafia, 24/7

Best bet for the weekend: Wins versus New York teams by the Revolution and the Red Sox.

I hope you all had a safe and happy Independence Day. Cellphone fireworks pictures FTW!

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sourcesBSMW posters Lefty and Coma, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. This one he got a princely racket. That’s what I said now.

I don’t have a prediction. But would you mind a comment? In a country where Lucy Burdge goes to bed hungry, competitive eating is disgusting.

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