08/25/2021 Cleaning Out the Sports Junk Drawer

Bob. Now that was a real hurricane.

The Football Gods can be so cruel, even in preseason.

East side of the hurricane gets the strongest winds, West side gets the heaviest rain. It’s the McDLT of weather systems.

Are the red-hot Revs peaking too early?

Mike Richards getting cancelled was off the board in Vegas.

Maybe the league should have written the COVID test protocol in Cam’s lunatic Instagram font?

I like my cults currency-based.

First Don Everly, then Charlie Watts. Be careful, pioneering rock & roll bass guitar player.

The Patriots running test is overrated for running backs.

Cakes are cooking for Tim Burton, Joanne Whalley, Vivian Campbell, Marti Noxon, and Spider One.

Trinitron. Traded.

For decades, all good stories started with multiple high schoolers in an American made vehicle hauling beer.

Green Line D Branch Update: Regular service has resumed with residual delays of up to 15 minutes. Shuttle buses are being phased out at this time.

Like I’ve been saying, only Barnes can kill Barnes.

Seahawks LB Ben Burr-Kirven suffered a torn ACL on Saturday night, source said following the MRI. The former fifth-round pick had worked with the starters and was impressing at camp, emerging as a key player. Now, done for the season.

Sha’Carri Richardson. Such a big personality. Like Cam’s!

Seeing the outpouring of heartfelt grief over Jimmy Hayes makes me wish I had known him. Or heard of him prior to this week, to be honest.

You didn’t how good you had it while the PayPig was around, did you, ladies? Sad.

Hey Gang from Paddy’s, this week’s Phrase that Pays is “playing like a team that already won the snaps that mattered.”

On old Olympus’ Towering Tops, a Finn and German viewed some hops.

I like drip-brew coffee better than the Keurig pods. There: I said it.

With non-team media brusquely banned for locker room access, what does this mean for old friend Amalie Benjamin?

If this Mike Richards thing has taught us anything, it’s this: never make a podcast.

Waiting is the hardest part.

Mac Jones should be playing from the start.

I’m done with Cam messing with my heart.

Waiting is the hardest part.

Perillo “likes to defer to Zo on the football stuff?”

Blehhhh! Staying home the last year before your daughter leaves for college! BLEHHHHH!!

‘Ivermectin’ sounds like a hockey player name. Or maybe tennis.

Famous adopted people include Simone Biles, Gerald Ford, Jamie Foxx, Faith Hill, Ray Liotta, and Dave Thomas.

Happy for all the OnlyFans creators.

Now I’m in my car
I got the radio on
I’m yellin’ at the kids in the back seat
‘Cause they’re bangin’ like Charlie Watts. You think you’ve come so far
In this one horse town
Then she’s laughin’ that crazy laugh
‘Cause you haven’t left the parkin’ lot.

Jungle Cruise is in Dale Arnold’s list of Top 5 Movies based on theme park rides.

Honk if you remember the McDLT’s styrofoam-intensive packaging.

Is that Milk Crate Challenge thing a fundraiser for sickle cell anemia research? What?

A: Tom Flores.

Someone put two dollars on the five horse in the third race at Saratoga to win. I’m good for it.

I hope no rappers expected to use Airkraft One as an AirLyft while it’s away on a mission of mercy delivering supplies to earthquake-ravaged Haiti.

Wow. That Kirk thing? At Saco? Classic!

Sure Mac has looked effective in the joint practice against the New York Football Giants. But Cam just tweeted something profound in Sanskrit while dressed like the bad guy from The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle.

Maybe there’s something to this ‘drinking light beer’ business?

No, getting past the 98.5 call screener is decidedly not tougher than what Sony Michel accomplished in the 2018 Playoffs. Losers.

Really though: are the Eagles going to commission a statue of last week’s joint practice?

Best bet for the weekend: accusations of racism.

The15 Remember, Sony Michel. Well done. Bonne chance.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, OnlyFans, other writers, league and team sources, @ralvarez617, and #the15 were used in this column. Do not apply externally.

This is Marianne Faithfull, who probably met Charlie Watts.

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