The 15

It’s never bad to beat the Broncos in Denver. Way to bounce back, Ryland.

Nice west coast road trip, Green Team.

It’d be a pleasant way to end that losing skid with a W against a Buffalo squad, Bruins.

I thought Tatum would have a nicer house, tbh.

Wonder if Red Sox told Yamamoto their ballpark is most beloved.

Jack Edwards is doing totally fine. Stop asking about him.

Congratulations to ‘Hardy’ for finally making above minimum wage after 25 years in radio.

Fun fact: The wild turkey was designated the state game bird of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts thirty-two years ago today.

Turtleboy goes before A Judge more than Gleyber Torres.

Cakes are cooking for John Amos, Mike Pinder, Terry Bozzio, Andre Tippett, Bill Self, Jim Leyritz, Bill Goldberg, Jean-Christophe Boullion, James Stewart, Carson Palmer, Emilie de Ravin, Paul Stastny, Hayley Williams, Rick Porcello, and Timothée Chalamet.

Started spur-of-the-moment (and way overdue) re-watch of one of HBO’s best, “Six Feet Under”. On 2nd viewing, you pick up on so much shit you missed the first time (& spot future stars). Such a unique premise with fantastic writing/acting, as well as perhaps the best finale ever. My only complaint: the show needed more Percocet.

The New Year is really right around the corner. I’m very excited.

Teams fuck themselves up attacking Hauser like he’s some traffic cone and turns out he isn’t. It’s like when the Celtics mismatch hunt and then struggle scoring because they aren’t playing within their offense.

Hi Upton, I just wondered if you had a personal anecdote about any famous event that happened in America in the 20th century?

Just thought of a random dark Curb Your Enthusiasm-esk bit … Larry wins a fantasy football league where one of his friends died during the season, tries to collect from the widow.

Red Line Update: This delay has cleared.

Hey gang of deceptively athletic types, this week’s Phrase that Pays is, “Do I have to draw you a picture? Fine. Hand me the peach crayon.”

I didn’t need my bank wishing me a Merry Christmas via email. I need them to just be quiet and hold onto my money.

Emile Coué + Oswald Bates = FCHWPO

I had a pair of the K-Mart fake Adidas with the five stripes when I was little. I would like to be in the documentary.

Holiday traffic really kills the holiday spirit.

There’s a coinflip’s chance Robert does something stupid because he’s miffed no one ever called him a genius or The GOAT.

Random thought/question: Anyone remember Pizzarias chips from Keebler? Those things were so good. They should bring them back!

Why do we never get an answer when we’re knocking at the door?
Because the truth, it’s hard to swallow, that’s what the war of love is for

It’s not the way that you say it,
When you do those things to me.
It’s more the way that you mean it,
When you tell me what will be.

And when you stop and think about it,
You won’t believe it’s true.
That all the love you’ve been giving,
Has all been meant for you.

I’m looking for someone to change my life.
I’m looking for a miracle in my life.
And if you could see what it’s done to me
To lose the the love I knew could safely lead me through.

“My sister was molested and all I got was this lousy excuse to drink” is a tee shirt you can find at Hampton Beach.

To the good, Aidan has a hairstyle that can be trimmed competently using only electric clippers.

Did the Lakers get that stupid IST champion banner from a company in Indianapolis?

You see, because..

The NFL let the Chiefs play too many games over the last five seasons on purpose to make them tired!

Wander Franco is now Evade Franco. Sad.

Honk if you remember when almost everything you wanted but didn’t get for Christmas was on sale now at Sears!

Hearing whispers everyone employed by that CONSONANTS vanity site have applied for the vacancy at 98.5.

Nemesis follows hubris, chudmuffins.

Go out and get that Washington Football Team a pair of wins, embedded Patriot Jacoby Brissett!

The comparison between Mike Trout and Mookie Betts is in several ways a replay of the competition between Mantle and Mays. Mantle won in the short run; Mays won in the long run–and it kind of looks like this one is going to go the same way.

Why is Servpro the sponsor of the First Responder Bowl?

Celibate Midget benched, Old Friend Stihdsy to get the first team reps the final two games for the Broncos.

Have a safe, happy, and at worst, mildly tipsy New Year’s Eve.

Best bet for the weekend: an entertaining Orange Bowl.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Bill James, and the members of #the15 were used in this column. What are words for, when no one listens anymore?