The 15

Don’t touch Himmy!

News Item: Nick Taylor wins Canadian Open, first time a Canadian has won since 1954. So you got that goin’ for you, Canadian NHL squads.

Type ‘Canadian’ more.

Yes, I definitely want to hear that you’re happy for Coach Cassidy.

The Sox PR department is losing its mojo. You gotta sneak middling guys with racists/sexist/homophobic social media postings onto the roster at 6pm on the Friday before a long weekend or 30 minutes before a Bruins/Celtics game 7.

Just sayin’, but the kid’s nickname isn’t ‘Baby Kelce.’

It’s getting a touch late in the season to be hovering around .500, Red Sox.

Volin must be horrified two of his Miami teams did the worst possible thing in professional sports: reach the finals and lose. C’s & B’s wisely dodged that bullet.

Vanderpump? What is that, Dutch?

Cakes are cooking for Rod Argent, Donald Trump, Will Patton, Fred Funk, Eric Heiden, Eugene Chung, Steffi Graf, A, J. Mleczko, Diablo Cody, and Lucy Hale.

Between Unabomber Ted and that Hanssen traitor croaking there’s some vacant cells available in Federal prison.

Of course Aaron Rodgers was at the Tony Awards.

Congratulations to Arcangelo & trainer Jena Antonucci for a thrilling and historic win at the Belmont Stakes.

I just be letting people cap.

Worcester Line Train 506 (7:00 am from Worcester) is operating 5-15 minutes behind schedule between Framingham and South Station.

Is Tanya Ray in the running for the vacated Shannon Sharpe spot on whichever sports yelling show he was on?

Tree frog!

It’s been less than a week that I have known of the song “Lost in the Woods” from Frozen 2, a movie I’ve not seen. This is my favorite song. It’s a wonderful tribute to David Foster/Peter Cetera hits of the 80s. Good on Frozen 2.

Instead of saying “a non-Power Five coach told me” Russillo should say “Trent Dilfer told me.”

That Peleton instructor Jess King seems like a nice lady.

Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain’t funny!

Aloha means ‘goodbye’. Aloha, Bob Kravitz.

Do you think other birds are jealous of cardinals?

Denver may have played all lower-seeded teams, but they did beat Jimmy Butler, who I’ve been told is the greatest, most clutch basketball player of all time. Incredible accomplishment.

Whenever Kung Fu Fighting comes on my playlist in the car I simply have to turn it up. Not apologizing.

I hope Asteroid City is sufficiently twee.

Patriots roster is now back at 90 after bringing back Justus Tavai.

You do not mess with “New York, New York.” It’s too perfect to make it about you.

Do YOU have a blog on a tertiary NHL website?

The people who don’t pay any attention to the “old” baseball statistics (Wins, RBI, Batting Average) are exactly like the people who won’t pay any attention to the new statistics. They just parked on the other side of the road, that’s all.

And if they stare
Just let them burn their eyes
On you moving
And if they shout
Don’t let it change a thing
That you’re doing

Hold your head up, woman
Hold your head up, woman
Hold your head up, woman
Hold your head high.

This is not Pat Cooper. Please find a correct photo if you’re going to honor him.

Honk if you remember Arrogate.

Did Paul Pierce ever party with Silvio Berlusconi? I hope so. RIP, bunga bunga man.

A fine showing for your return to Le Mans, NASCAR.

Tough break in the CWS, Texas. I blame Rosenblatt Stadium, or whatever it’s called now, being as poorly illuminated as the Palestra or the Dallas Sportatorium.

Candace Parker had – 400 odds to win Celebrity Jeopardy? That’s not too shabby. What? That was her final score? Oh.

When I say ‘D’, you say ‘HOP!’ D! (pause) D! (pause) (did you do it?)

Third Eye Blind is background bar music now?

Like The Athletic was ever going to fire Buckley during Pride Month.

Be nice to your veterinary staff.

Is there anybody who is bipolar and doesn’t let people know at every chance? They’re like vegans, or CrossFit enthusiasts, or people from Texas.

Everyone please have a safe and happy Flag Day.

With the final day of minicamp called off, maybe the Patriots beat writers could use the freed up time to shop for some decent clothes, the kind that fit?

Best bet for the weekend: The phone not ringing at Gerry Callahan’s on Father’s Day.

Material from interviews, wire services, Twitter, Meta, other writers, league and team sources, Bill James, Mitch Hedberg, BSMW poster Laszlo Panaflex and the members of #the15 were used in this column. Well, let me tell you ’bout the way she looked the way she’d act and the color of her hair. Her voice was soft and cool, her eyes were clear and bright but she’s not there.